To Love And To Fear
by Cloud Green
Summary: Kurt had dreamed of moving to New York with Blaine, but he soon finds a city and success can change a person. Blaine is not the loving gentleman he once was, and Kurt finds himself fearing the boy he fell in love with. Dark!Blaine Abused!Kurt
1. The New York Dream

A.N. So I'm working on the story 'Fool Me Once, Fool Me Twice', and this one-shot idea keeps poking me in the brain (figuratively of course, although I now have a real headache…). So I give up on my current fic to write this one. It was supposed to be a one-shot but after finishing this part I now have more ideas for it so I'll probably jump between stories to keep myself amused and excited. I've really been getting into Dark!Blaine recently, so if you love goody-goody Blaine then my stories probably aren't for you! Thank you for taking the time to read it, and please review! w

**The New York Dream**

It was approaching two am. Kurt sat on the sofa in the living room watching the clock on the wall with eyes as wide and round as saucers. His knees were up against his chest, his feet tucked under his body. He gently bit on his fingernails, a habit he had picked up not long after he arrived in New York, and tried to calm his racing heart.

He was bound to be home soon. He always came home around this time. After he's had his fun in the city, Blaine would come through the apartment door and Kurt knew he had to be up waiting for him. If he dared fall asleep before Blaine got home, Kurt would pay for it. His body ached to go to bed, and his eyes almost burned after being forced to remain open over the last few hours. What he would give to just go to bed and sleep… No. No, he would regret it.

Kurt jumped when he heard the familiar jingle of keys at the front door. _Oh God, he's home-!_ After having spent the last three hours perched still on the sofa, Kurt still felt unprepared as he leapt up and smoothed himself down to look 'pretty and presentable'. His heart was beating so fast. He prayed Blaine was in a good mood. The door opened and Kurt readied himself by smiling warmly at the young man who sauntered in. Kurt was relieved to see Blaine wearing a small smile – a smirk? – and his footwork wasn't sloppy so he wasn't drunk.

'Blaine,' Kurt started in his typical loving, happy voice. He stepped forward and helped remove Blaine's coat. 'Welcome home.'

The other man watched him, looking amused. As Kurt went to hang up the coat by the door, Blaine replied coolly 'What, no kiss?'

Kurt panicked a little and almost dropped the coat on the floor. 'A-ah, sorry, sorry!' He stepped up to Blaine again and gave him a small yet meaningful kiss. How could he mess up so early? Then again, Blaine had a habit of changing his mind when it came to how he wanted Kurt to act. If he kissed him, Blaine would say he should have offered him a welcome home drink first. If he then had a drink at the ready the next time, Blaine would say he should have taken his coat off him first. Now it seems Blaine wanted a kiss before Kurt did anything. It sent Kurt's heart racing so fast; it was hard for him to feel tired anymore. Blaine seemed to let him off the hook this time. He must have had a good night. Blaine wrapped his strong arms around Kurt's waist and tightened. Kurt smiled, pretending he was loving it, but he was finding it a little hard to breathe. Blaine's eyes flashed in the light of the hallway lamp, and Kurt knew he was enjoying the panic in his own eyes. 'D-did you have a good night?'

Blaine eased up on his hold, and his hands slid to Kurt's rear. He squeezed gently, causing Kurt to wince. He was still very sore in that area and Blaine knew it. 'It was fun.' Blaine replied, tipping his head to the side lazily. 'But after you've been to one New York club, you've been to them all.'

Kurt smiled. 'Then maybe you'll stay home with me one of these nights?' He suggested lightly. 'I miss you when you're gone.' That was partly true. He missed the old Blaine, the one who got on the plane with him five months ago with the same innocent and excited nature Kurt had. The one who had to be talked into moving to New York so soon after graduation. The one who then agreed by saying he'd be happy anywhere, as long as Kurt was with him. That's the Blaine he wanted home with him on these dark, cold winter nights. Not the one who he lived with now. Kurt didn't know where this Blaine came from, but wherever he came from Kurt wanted him to go back there.

Blaine chuckled to himself at Kurt's words. 'Why? Don't you like our apartment?'

Kurt inched his feet closer together as he glanced around the hall. 'Sure I do. I mean, it's amazing…'

'Much better than the dump we first stayed in,' Blaine interrupted.

'Well…' Kurt bit his lip. Truthfully, he had loved their old Brooklyn apartment. It was in one of the cheapest areas, since that was all they could afford when they first moved out here, but it encompassed everything Kurt had wanted, from the wooden floorboards that creaked, to the rust-ridden fire escape outside the large single window in the small but cosy living room. They were only a subway ride away from where they needed to go. Sadly, they didn't stay there as long as Kurt had hoped. Blaine saw to that.

'What, you prefer that hovel of a place back in Brooklyn?' Blaine narrowed his eyes, and Kurt got worried again. Blaine had been in a good mood, he couldn't ruin it!

'That's not what I meant, I _love _this place!' Kurt insisted, pressing his cheek against Blaine's chest. 'It's what we dreamed of living in.' Kurt _hated_ this place. He had always thought he would love living in Manhattan – the stores, the food, the people. It was all a farce, though. Or perhaps it was just Blaine's new idea of a perfect lifestyle that didn't agree with Kurt. Their current apartment was bought and paid for my Blaine's first pay cheque, something Kurt didn't think they would be able to accomplish for years yet. The place was huge and grand and decorated immaculately by special designers. Blaine was sure to pick the best place that was on the market. Kurt was sure he'd grow to love it like he did their Brooklyn home, but instead he found himself detesting it more and more each day. Still, he lied to Blaine to make him happy. 'It's so much better. We're in Manhattan!'

Blaine smiled and let Kurt go. 'Good. I'd hate to think you didn't appreciate it.' He left Kurt standing in the hallway and headed into the kitchen. 'You have my drink ready, right?'

Kurt rushed after him. 'Yeah, it's just…' He opened the fridge door and took out the chilled glass and handed it to Blaine, who was still watching Kurt like an amused hawk watches a scared field mouse. 'I didn't know when you would be home, so I got it ready a while ago.' He gave a small and insecure smile. 'I know how much you hate it when it's not ready.'

Blaine hummed in response and left to go to the oversized living room. One side of the room was all glass and overlooked the city below. He inspected the glass lazily, and Kurt held back at the door. It was always the same. Blaine would check that his home was spotless whenever he came home as if to make sure Kurt was doing something useful when he had the place to himself. The state of the apartment seemed to please him tonight and he finally sat down on the sofa. He sipped his drink, closing his eyes to savour the taste, before patting the spot next to him for Kurt to sit. 'Come here, baby.'

Kurt was still hesitant when he moved across to his boyfriend, but sat down as he was told. He lifted his feet up and knelt on them, leaning on Blaine's side and resting his head on his shoulder. 'How was work today?'

'Busy. I think I need a new agent. I told Jason I didn't want any fans in my way today but I still ended up signing autographs for twenty solid minutes. Barely got out of the set in one piece.'

Kurt made sympathetic noises, cuddling into Blaine's side. He liked Jason…The guy was nice, and still had managed to keep some sense of morals despite being an entertainment agent for years. Kurt hoped Blaine changed his mind; he couldn't cope if another jerk came into their lives. There were too many already, only Blaine seemed to like their presence. 'They just admire you, that's all. Just think: You take two seconds to sign your name on a simple piece of paper for someone and you make them the happiest they're going to be all year.'

'They piss me off.'

Kurt flinched a little and hoped Blaine wasn't going to get angry. He decided to try a different tactic. He scooted up further and kissed at Blaine's neck gently. 'Well, I'm glad your home with me now. I think this city gets you more than I do sometimes.' Blaine chuckled again and finished his drink in one swig. Kurt hoped he wouldn't want another. He was lucky Blaine didn't come home drunk tonight, and wanted to keep him as sober as possible. 'Why don't we go to bed? I've wanted to curl up next to you all day.' He once again tried to convince Blaine by sneaking neck kisses.

Blaine seemed to think about it before nodding. Kurt felt elated. He took Blaine's hand and led him to their bedroom. It was the biggest bedroom out of the four they had. In their old bedroom in Brooklyn, there was barely enough room for their mattress but it felt safe as Kurt had covered every flat surface with photographs – mostly of himself and Blaine. Now, their bedroom was large, sleek and stylish with odd-shaped ornaments and impractical furniture. When Kurt had tried to set up the photographs, Blaine had scowled at him and told him to put all that kind of stuff in the smallest bedroom that they barely ever entered. Kurt had argued at first, as it was still a little before Blaine's temper grew out of control, but Blaine had firmly reminded Kurt of his place. Blaine owned the apartment, Kurt didn't. Blaine had a high paying acting job, Kurt was unemployed. Blaine could do whatever he wanted. Kurt was to just sit pretty and do as he was told. Otherwise…well, the best case scenario would be if Blaine threw him out on the street but he knew Blaine would rather take other forms of action instead.

Kurt let Blaine undress before he too removed his clothes. Blaine liked it when he could watch Kurt undress. Occasionally he would get that look in his eyes and take control. Tonight, Kurt could see he was quite happy to lie back on the bed and simply watch. Kurt shivered. Ever since that night they first made love, Blaine had always looked at him with lust when Kurt took off his 'layers'. But it was different now. Kurt no longer felt sexy or good about himself. He just felt nervous and sometimes scared under his boyfriend's gaze. Blaine had proven several times now that his sexual appetite was a little more extreme than before. Tonight was a very good night indeed. Blaine let Kurt undress and motioned for him to join him on the bed before Kurt had a chance to look out pyjamas. Kurt, once again, did as he was told and crawled up the bed and into Blaine's arms.

'Blaine…did you think any more about what I said this morning? You know, about Christmas?' He asked offhandedly.

Blaine's eyes were roaming Kurt's body lazily. 'Hmm? Oh. Yeah, I don't think that's going to happen. I've got so much promotional work to do over Christmas, a trip back home just to see the family isn't going to fit in with the agenda.'

Kurt swallowed. Not even an apology? He nestled closely into Blaine to maintain their 'loving' contact. 'Oh…won't your mum be disappointed? And your dad?' _Not to mention my family, if you don't give me permission to go by myself_.

'I'm sure they'll understand. We're going to be busy. We'll go home sometime in January. Maybe February, just to be safe.'

Kurt looked up at Blaine, looking upset. 'We?' He couldn't help but want to know why he was suddenly involved in Blaine's work.

Blaine's eyes focused on Kurt's and he stared the smaller boy down. 'Yes, we. You're my boyfriend, Kurt. You need to be seen out with me, being supportive. Do you want all the single gay men in New York to be hitting on me, thinking I'm available?'

Kurt shook his head slowly. 'Of course not…' He looked away sadly. He'd have to call his dad the next day and let him know he wouldn't be home for Christmas. The one thing his dad made him promise before he left Ohio: Come home for Christmas – even if it means walking all the way back. It was going to be a promise Kurt wasn't going to keep. Kurt was sure his dad would be more than willing to pay for their flights back to Ohio, but money wasn't the issue. It never was, nowadays. Not to Blaine, anyway. Blaine had more money than Kurt's dad ever had. When it came to money, there truly was no business like show business. 'It's just…it'll be my dad's first Christmas without me since I was born. And it'll be my first Christmas without him.'

Blaine forced Kurt to lie down on the bed so he could lean over him. Kurt knew Blaine was beautiful. Even after the events that had taken place over the past few months, Kurt still found Blaine to be the most beautiful guy he had ever seen. Yet, he couldn't admire the beauty. He just felt scared and intimidated by Blaine's intense stare, knowing what the ex-Warbler was capable of. 'You're dad has Carole and Finn. He doesn't need you home. And you…' He smirked and leaned further down so he could murmur lowly by Kurt's ear. 'You have me.' Blaine began kissing Kurt's earlobe, biting when it pleased him. 'Just think about all the naughty stuff we could do. Daddy won't be any the wiser.' He laughed when Kurt shivered hard, and he settled down beside him. He gently stroked Kurt's cheek and then kissed him deeply, his tongue dominating Kurt's into a submissive state. He pulled apart when Kurt began to whimper. 'You'll have to think of ways to show your gratitude for all the presents you'll get.'

A few months before, Kurt would have smiled and giggled at the implication Blaine made and he might have been bold enough to give an equally suggestive comment in return, but not now. He flushed darkly and wriggled uncomfortably. 'I-I'm sure I will.'

Blaine had denied him the Christmas he wanted, and all he can do is go along with it? Kurt felt miserable. It was a permanent state he was in these days. Blaine laughed again and gave Kurt one last kiss. 'Make sure they're good enough for me, baby. Goodnight.' With that, he wrapped his strong arms around Kurt and pulled him close. Kurt couldn't have pulled away an inch even if he decided he was brave enough to try. All in all, except for the crushing disappointment concerning their holiday plans, the night had been successful. Blaine hadn't got too mad or out of control at all. Kurt was still in one piece and in no physical pain. He knew that he probably wouldn't be as lucky tomorrow, but at least for now he let himself relax as much as he could into sleep.


	2. Blaine's Ohio Secret

A.N. Finally! I've been meaning to upload the second part of this story for ages but I always felt it was too boring. I've changed a few things to my original draft so hopefully it'll be entertaining enough. It's odd, though; I like the premise of this story but since I'm knee-deep in my other main fic I never know how much time and attention to give this one. Do you guys want me to focus more on this, or would you rather I keep it as a background thing? One person suggested I deal with the other fic and finish it so I can give this just as much attention and thought but I always feel good knowing if I've got writer's block for one I have another I can work on. Let me know what you think, and review with your comments for this chapter if you have any. 

**Blaine's Ohio Secret**

'Blaine! You're the hottest new thing hitting our screens these days, not to mention being on the cover of _Entertainment Weekly, Vogue_ and _New York Times-'_ The studio audience cheers and whistles as the talk show host continued 'How does it feel to have all this in just a few of months of being in the spotlight?'

Blaine sat opposite the host on a leather couch, looking flattered and flushed in the cheeks at all the praise. 'Oh, you know it's all so mind-blowing, y'know? I'm very fortunate, and so lucky to have great people around me to keep me grounded. I'm trying to not let anything get to me; I don't want to be one of those people who change with success. I want to do a good job and just enjoy myself!'

'Well, you're not disappointing anyone today, is he, folks?' The audience screamed louder, and applauded the young actor's graciousness. 'See? We all love you! Now, let's talk about your personal life. You come from Ohio, that's where you went to school?'

Blaine nodded. 'Yeah, I went to three different high schools all in Ohio.'

The host gave him a cheeky grin. 'And you met your boyfriend there? Kurt Hummel?'

Blaine's smile faltered, but not enough for anyone to notice, 'Kurt? Yeah,' His eyes shifted off-screen at someone and then back at the host.

'And, of course, you both moved out to New York together?'

Blaine stared at the host, eyes dead set and serious. He did not want to talk about Kurt. 'Yes.' He answered simply. It was unclear if the host sensed his displeasure of the topic of conversation, but suddenly they moved on to talk about the breakout character Blaine played on his television series and Blaine eased up almost immediately. Finally, the host announced that it was time for break and thanked Blaine for being there. The audience once again went crazy and some fans could be heard declaring their love for him. Blaine smiled back at them all and waved at each in turn – probably resulting in quite a few fainting.

Kurt turned off the TV and sat on the couch in silence. This was the third time this month his name had been brought up on national television interviews. He shuddered. This was not good. Blaine made a point of avoiding anything Kurt-related, not wanting any media attention on his boyfriend without his saying so. He stood up and cleared away his lunch. He had managed to eat half of his sandwich today, which was a record and made him feel queasy as his stomach was now not used to him eating an awful lot. After cleaning the dishes and tidying up for the fourth time that day (despite the fact the apartment was utterly spotless to begin with), Kurt sat back down. He knew he wasn't supposed to go out anywhere, but there was nothing to do. Fortunately he saved from twiddling his thumbs when his phone beeped. He had a new message from Blaine's agent, Jason: 

**Hey Kurt, just letting you know Blaine won't be back till tonight. Last minute shooting was arranged but it means he'll be free all day tomorrow. –Jason**

Kurt sighed. Trust Blaine not to text him himself. He was thankful for Jason. Without him, he'd never know where his boyfriend was 99.9% of the time. He checked his watch. It was just after one in the afternoon. Normally last minute shooting didn't end until nine, which meant Kurt had a lot of hours to do nothing with in the apartment. Then again… Kurt bit his bottom lip. Blaine forbade him to leave the apartment without asking permission first and there was no way Blaine would give him permission now after that interview. He'd want Kurt indoors and out of sight.

'Why does he have to know?' Kurt asked himself, his voice sounding small in his big, silent home. Jason would tell him if shooting finished early, so why not window shop for a couple of hours? His stomach clenched at the thought of going against Blaine's words. The truth was despite there being almost no chance of Blaine ever finding out, Kurt was still scared. He'd be so mad…

Swallowing hard, Kurt picked up his cell and typed a message back to Jason:

**Thanks for telling me. Let me know when he's almost done so I can get dinner ready on time for him getting home. –Kurt **

There. Kurt felt a little more at ease. Jason was a good guy; he'd let Kurt know when to expect Blaine home leaving him plenty of time to get home himself if shooting finished earlier than expected. Feeling more relaxed, Kurt readied himself for a day of 'incognito window shopping'.' 

* * *

><p>Kurt wandered around the counter of <em>Jasper's Boutique<em> – a local haven of Kurt only a few streets away from his apartment. The owner, Jasper, didn't pay any attention to celebrity gossip unless it occurred on the catwalk so Kurt felt safe and hidden as he admired the stylish clothing. He gave a small gasp in awe as he spotted a beautiful pair of men's suede shoes propped up by the window. He leaned down and traced his finger across the careful stitching. These were the type of shoes Kurt had been looking for ever since he turned up at one of Blaine's work parties being the only one in shoes costing less than two hundred dollars. It was embarrassing. He checked the price tag, and paled. His own dad would have had to save up an entire year's wages to be able to buy these kinds of shoes. Kurt looked at them longingly. Perhaps if Blaine was in a good mood the next day he would agree to take Kurt shopping? Since he began earning big, Blaine had developed a taste for splashing his money around Kurt whenever he had the chance. It wasn't so much an 'I'll get you anything you want because I care' type of splashing, but more of a 'I have the money, that means I'm the boss' type. It normally made Kurt feel like crap and totally inadequate but he was fairly certain these shoes would help numb those feelings. Kurt knew he'd have to make Blaine think he was seeing the shoes for the first time so he wouldn't suspect Kurt had been out without him. That was something he could do, he was sure. Kurt carefully placed the shoes back on the window shelf, but before he could pull away-

_FLASH_!

Kurt blinked repeatedly. What was-?

_FLASH! FLASH_!

Lightning? Was there a storm or something? Kurt then felt ill as his eyes adjusted from the flashing lights. 'Oh God…' Through the shop window Kurt could see half a dozen photographers holding up their cameras to him. Immediately he backed away, and turned to Jasper. 'H-hey, you got a back door out of here?' Jasper gave him an insulted look which told Kurt his incognito clothing was not impressive enough to warrant any extra assistance. Kurt looked around in desperation, still hearing the snapping shots as the photographers continued to get pictures of him. This is what he thought he had avoided! Practically shaking, Kurt lifted his oversized jumper's hood over his head and pulled the cords so as to cover most of his features. There was no other way out. He'd have to make a run for it. He pulled open the boutique door and kept his head down. He could still see flashes but he hoped they would eventually back off now that he was barely recognisable. They didn't, and as he pushed through the crowd that had gathered he tried not to panic.

'Hey, Kurt!'

'Kurt, over here!'

'Why so shy, Mr Hummel?'

'How's Blaine today?'

'Look this way!'

His heart thumped so hard he could have sworn it beating him back as he tried to move forward. It seemed like a miracle when he felt an old woman pull him away and up to a waiting taxi. 'Take my cab, honey,' she murmured to him sympathetically. Kurt could barely manage out a thank you as he crawled into the backseat. The door slammed behind him but he could still hear the shouting. He continued to cover his face as he stuttered out his address. It barely took two minutes for Kurt to pull up by the entrance to his apartment building. He tried to pull out his wallet with his shaking hands, but the driver said the ride was on him and to take it easy. Despite the kindness, Kurt couldn't find it in him to show how grateful he was. He mumbled out another thank you and then ran inside and up the several flights of stairs to his front door, as if expecting those monsters to be chasing him. Momentarily forgetting where his keys were, he fell against the door and took in many mouthfuls of air. Tears were splashing down his face. Tears of fear. Those pictures of him in the boutique would be online any second now, if they weren't already. Blaine will no doubt see him within the hour, since his phone received all news and gossip relating to him and Kurt would definitely fall under things relating to him. No matter how much he tried, Kurt couldn't get rid of the nauseous sensation in his stomach. Blaine was going to be beyond mad. Kurt was supposed to obey him, not undermine him when he wasn't there. And after his mention on the talk show…it wasn't good to think of that.

It took Kurt the best part of an hour to fish out his keys and enter the apartment, and a further ten minutes for him to remember to close the door behind him. 

* * *

><p>Seven o'clock. Kurt's wide eyes couldn't leave the TV clock. He had expected Jason to contact him before now with news of when to expect Blaine home but so far nothing. Blaine hadn't called either. Kurt wasn't sure if that was good or bad, and he was still too scared to call him up himself. It was deadly quiet, apart from the faint sounds of New York traffic. Kurt poured himself another cup of coffee after his first cup got cold from sitting out. He couldn't drink it, but the smell calmed him a little.<p>

He then heard a click. Abandoning the coffee in the kitchen, Kurt tip-toed to the edge of the hallway to see the front door open and Blaine step in. Kurt studied his face carefully. He was not happy, that was obvious, but he didn't seem mad. Kurt timidly walked towards him wearing his 'welcome home' smile as best he could. 'Hey, you,' He helped the other man take his jacket off. Blaine glanced at him with cloudy eyes and muttered some type of greeting in response. His hair was looser than normal, and his curls were more defined as if it hadn't been touched with hair products since that morning. 'I thought you were doing some filming today?'

Blaine grunted, throwing his wallet and keys against the wall. 'I was supposed to.' Kurt picked up his things and put them quietly on the shelf by the front door where Blaine would expect to find them later. 'But that asshole fucked it up, so I didn't get to the studio in time.' Blaine headed down the hall to the living room.

This was…odd. Normally, Blaine would scrutinise their home and then examine Kurt for flaws, but he'd barely spared a second glance at his boyfriend since he came in. Kurt knew Blaine must not have found out about him after all. Still, Kurt held back at the living room door. He didn't like it when Blaine swore; it meant he wasn't caring. 'Wh-who's that?'

'Jason, who else?' Blaine muttered, sitting back on the couch closing his eyes. 'My ex-agent.'

Kurt took a step forward. 'Ex-agent? You didn't fire him, did you?'

Blaine's eyes opened and he stared at Kurt in suspicion. 'Of course I did. He kept fucking up. Why do you care anyway?'

Kurt clasped his hands and turned to the side in submission. 'I-I don't, I just…liked him. He seemed to be looking out for you, that's all.'

'Looking out for me, my ass.' Blaine snorted, 'He arranged fan meets when he knows I hate them, he forgets to make it clear to interviewers that I don't want you to come up in any Q&A's I have – did you see the show today? Barely a minute in and your name cropped up.' His tone was accusative, and it made Kurt feel shame despite the fact he had no reason to. 'And then today he got me to the set at two thirty when I had to be there at two, meaning I had no reason to be there. He claimed the times must have been changed without anyone telling him but I had enough of excuses. He's lucky I didn't kick his ass there and then.'

Kurt couldn't help but feel upset at this news. Jason was one of the few 'good guys' left around Blaine nowadays, and was probably the reason Blaine hadn't got into trouble after his initial fame rise. Now he was gone, and Kurt could only worry about what that meant. 'So…does that mean you'll be getting another agent?'

Blaine nodded and closed his eyes again. 'Not tomorrow. Tomorrow is my first proper day off in weeks, I want to enjoy it. I'll look for one after.'

Kurt swallowed, 'O-okay…Uh, listen, I wasn't sure when you'd be back so I didn't make anything for dinner. Will I call us a pizza?' He felt relief when Blaine waved his hand in a dismissive 'yes' manner. Normally Blaine got angry when Kurt had fallen short of his 'homemaker' duties. He picked up his phone and dialled the local pizza place. He heard Blaine playing around with his cell phone in the background as he asked for his Blaine's favourite type of pizza. Before he could finish giving his address, however, Kurt felt his phone be lifted away from him and shut off. He turned in confusion and was met with the furious stare of Blaine. 'Wh-what's wrong?'

Blaine held up his own cell, showing a picture with a caption underneath. It was from a New York-based gossip website. **Blaine's Beau Out Shopping In High-Class Store Wearing **_**This?** _Above the caption was a clear shot of a surprised Kurt in his over-sized hoodie from that afternoon. 'You wanna explain yourself?' Blaine said, his tone low and incensed. 'Why the fuck were you out today? Huh?'

Kurt took a small step away, arms already coming up to guard his upper body almost instinctively. 'I-I just went out f-for something to do – a-and I swear, I was only out for twenty minutes just down the street! I didn't think you'd m-'

'Mind?' Blaine finished for him. 'You thought I wouldn't mind? I fucking mind, Kurt!' Blaine tossed the cell aside and stepped up to Kurt as if not noticing that his boyfriend was trying to back away. 'I told you not to go out without my saying so, you know why? So shit like that doesn't happen!' He backed Kurt into a corner. 'Now all the reporters and paparazzi are going to camp outside the building waiting for you – is that what you want?'

Kurt pressed his hand to his mouth and shook his head. 'N-no, of course not,' He said fearfully.

'Well that's what's going to happen, you stupid fuck!' Blaine's eyes then widened. 'No. This is what you wanted, isn't it?' he shook his head in disbelief as Kurt wondered what he could possibly mean. 'You want the attention on you, don't you? You want the spotlight.' He ignored Kurt as the smaller boy shook his head quickly in denial. 'That's why you liked Jason. With him, people would not know that you weren't a topic of conversation. Did you two have something going on?'

Kurt was grabbed tightly by his upper arms. 'N-no, Blaine, don't be ridiculous-!'

'I bet you did! You two had a plan to get the interest onto you so you could weasel your way into the limelight, using me as a step, huh?' Blaine was shaking him now.

'Blaine, please stop! I don't want any attention, a-and today I tried really hard not to be seen, I swear! I ran! I ran away because I knew how mad you'd get and I'm sorry, okay?' Kurt was blubbering now as Blaine's eyes just hardened. 'I just wanted out of the apartment, I wasn't thinking straight.'

There was silence. Kurt stared into Blaine's eyes, needing to know what his boyfriend was thinking now. 'What's wrong with the apartment?' Blaine asked sharply.

'N-nothing, I just…I've been in here all week.' Kurt tried to calm his voice to a reasoning tone. He knew from experience the more hysterical and upset he sounded, the quicker Blaine was to try and punch it out of him. 'I love the apartment. I-it's our home. B-but-'

'You don't appreciate how good you have it, do you?' Blaine shoved him against the wall hard enough for Kurt to cry in pain as the back of his head made contact with the wooden panelling. 'You ungrateful little shit; I'm the one who pays for all this!' Kurt reached out to him, his hand desperately trying to stop Blaine from coming closer. Blaine pushed his hand away and aimed a fist to the left side of Kurt's face. Kurt fell from the impact, narrowly missing the sharp bedroom door handle.

'Blaine, stop, you're doing it again-!'

'Shut up! What's with you, huh?' Blaine kicked the side of Kurt's stomach to force him onto his back. He then kneeled down beside him and grabbed his front with one hand. Pulling Kurt up a few inches from the carpet, Blaine used his free hand to sink a couple of punches into him. His eyes bore nothing but contempt despite Kurt's desperate crying and coughing. 'I bring you out here, I give you this place to call home, I show you the best of what New York has to offer and you still complain!'

Kurt tried to pull his knees up to block further attacks but his muscles give up on him and he could only twitch and twist uselessly in Blaine's grasp. 'S-stop…' He pleads.

'You are so fucking lucky to have me!' Blaine snapped at him, forcing the other's head back to the floor, straining Kurt's neck painfully. 'You know how many beautiful guys come on to me each day? And each time I say I have a boyfriend. A loving boyfriend at home who is waiting for me. But it seems in reality I just have you. You think you'll ever do better than me, Kurt?'

He had stopped in his punches, but Kurt still sobbed. He weakly pushed at Blaine's hands, the back of his neck in agony at the straining. ''m s-sorry…I'm sorry, Blaine, please…'

Blaine continued to glare at his lover's tear-stricken face, and was not letting up on him until there was suddenly a knock at the door. Both Blaine and Kurt stared at each other. Blaine's hand came away from Kurt's neck. 'Are we expecting someone?' Kurt shook his head, his body shaking beyond his control. Blaine, now suddenly very calm and composed, stood up and smoothed out his clothes as Kurt curled up into a ball at his feet. Another knock at the door made Blaine let out a frustrated sigh and he strode down the hall towards the front door. Kurt, ashamed, shifted himself into the corner to stay out of sight of whoever was visiting them.

'Hey, Mr Anderson!' Kurt heard a cheery voice say. 'My boss says he got an order from someone that sounded like your boyfriend but then the call was cut off. You still needing that pizza?'

Kurt took in a few deep breaths in relief at the interruption, despite the fact each breath resulted in his entire body writhing in pain. It was Philip, the delivery guy from the pizza place. Of course, someone was going to recognise his voice when he ordered. They phoned up pizza from there all the time. He waited for Blaine's response. He wasn't all that surprised to hear Blaine sound completely relaxed and happy. 'Oh geez, sorry about that. Yeah our phone's been giving us trouble lately. How much is that?'

'Twelve ninety-five, sir,'

'Awesome, here's fifteen. Thanks for coming out.'

'No problem, dude, see ya.'

Blaine closed the door and could be heard carrying their pizza through to the kitchen. Kurt wasn't sure what to do, so he just stayed put huddled in the corner. 'Kurt?' He shivered. Blaine was calling on him. 'Kurt, come through here.'

Kurt used door handles to pull himself up onto his quivering feet. It took him a minute but finally he walked into the kitchen and found Blaine sitting up at the breakfast bar holding a slice of pizza, a bite already taken from it. Kurt held himself tightly and he could feel his eyes were red and sore. Blaine motioned for him to take a seat next to him, so Kurt complied silently. Blaine took another bite and then put his food down. Kurt stared. It was like he was a completely different person, like the monster that had been attacking him only minutes ago was just a figment of his imagination. Blaine turned himself on his seat to face Kurt and he took his hands in his own. He stroked the skin on the back of his hand gently as he stared into Kurt's confused wet eyes. 'I accept your apology,' He said simply, pushing a strand of hair behind Kurt's ear. 'I just…' He sighed heavily, 'I just need you to promise never to disobey me again. What you did was stupid, and I need to know you won't let it happen again. For both our sakes, especially yours.

The sane and logical part of Kurt's mind told him this was wrong. After all Blaine did to him and expected of him. His punishments… But it didn't matter. Kurt found himself nodding almost frantically. 'I promise, Blaine, I swear. I am so sorry-'

'And you love me?'

'Y-yes…'

'Say it.'

'I-I love you, Blaine.'

Kurt gave him watery smile, to which Blaine smiled back, bringing his thumb up to wipe away excess tears from his lover's eyes. 'I love you too, Kurt. Now, come here and help me eat this, hmm?' Blaine pulled him onto his lap, and Kurt was only too happy to bask in his love once more. A slice of pizza was held up to his face and Blaine teased him by pulling it away when he went for a bite. They laughed a little together, Kurt's laughter stemming mostly from post-panic relief than actual humour. He was so thankful tonight's ordeal was cut short. Some nights there was no liberation, no interruptions or reasons for Blaine to stop. Other nights, Blaine's temper even lived on in the bedroom where Kurt would be made to feel…no, it wasn't worth going into it now. Tonight, he was safe. Blaine's arms were secure around his still-aching waist and the voice in his ear was tender and doting. Yes, he was thankful. After all, he screwed up big today. In some ways, he actually deserved what he got. 

* * *

><p>Around 3am, Kurt woke up to the sound of soft weeping beside him. The naked body next to him was pulling closer, and his lover's arms wrapped around him gently. 'K-Kurt…'<p>

Kurt could tell from Blaine's voice that he was still half-asleep, so he softly responded with 'What's the matter?'

'Kurt, baby…' Blaine sniffed. The moonlight from the window shone on his watery eyes and his cheeks were wet. Kurt turned himself to be able to cradle his boyfriend's cheek with his hand, hushing him softly. 'N-no, Kurt…I'm sorry. What I did…I'm sorry. It wasn't you,'

'Shhh, shh, Blaine, it's okay,' Kurt frowned. He hated when this happened. 'Go back to sleep.'

'Kurt, please. It's not okay. I don't want to hurt you – I love you. I'm sorry, Kurt, baby, I'm sorry, I don't mean to do it…'

Kurt nodded and continued to comfort Blaine until the other's eyes eventually fell shut once more. Kurt watched him sleep. He was such a harmless angel when he was asleep. And on nights like these when he woke up blubbering out apologies he gave Kurt false hope that things would change. They never changed. He'd promise, but…

The following morning, Kurt asked Blaine how he slept. Blaine shrugged and responded 'Like a dead baby, Kurt. A dead baby.' 

* * *

><p>A.N. Don't forget to review! Do you guys want me to focus more on this or should my attention be solely on Fool Me Once, Fool Me Twice?<p> 


	3. Lonely on a Rooftop

A.N. Hiya folks! Sorry it's been a while since I updated this story, it is down to my own fault - that fault being that I didn't have a clear idea where I wanted this story to be headed. It's taken some thinking but I finally have a plot I'm happy with! I've outlined the next couple of chapters so I should be able to update faster after some feedback. I got quite a few private messages for the last chapter wanting to know where I was going with this story in terms of Kurt 'getting out of there' – some people want more drama, some want a quick happy ending, some want a DomXSub relationship and so on. So to answer some queries, Kurt is going to be different in this story compared to others I write of him. I like him to be very human and because of that he goes through stages of bravery and then cowardice. I also want Blaine to be a bit more calculated, as in this type of relationship the abuser will always fear that their victim will realise they can leave and so they will go to odd and extreme lengths to stop it. That's where this story is heading, basically.

WARNING! This chapter once again contains abuse but also rape and sexual violence. If that upsets you PLEASE don't read it, although if you have read my other stories you'll know what to expect.

Please enjoy and review with your thoughts! I'll answer any questions, and there might be a few after this part… 

* * *

><p><strong>Lonely on a Rooftop<br>**

Kurt was wary as he watched Blaine perform a series of slide shuffles around the apartment as he got himself ready. No, Blaine's perfectly as-if-choreographed moves were not what surprised him but instead it was the bright nature in which they were delivered. Blaine was happy.

After sipping his coffee hesitantly, Kurt cleared his throat. 'Why so jovial? Did I miss the announcement that bowties were back in fashion?'

Blaine turned to him in mid-search for his cell. His lip curved up in a smirk at Kurt's sarcasm. 'Don't pretend that bowties don't turn you on.' He pocketed his cell before stalking up to boy at the breakfast bar. 'And since when was a little dancing fever something to question? Aren't I allowed to be happy, baby?' He held Kurt still as he nuzzled his mouth against his boyfriend's neck, nibbling with the intent to leave a little mark.

Kurt squirmed against Blaine's hold but he knew it was useless. It had been a while since he had believed he could fight back. 'No,' Finally he was released and Blaine leaned over the countertop in front of him. 'I'm just saying that normally you aren't so cheerful as to shuffle around at 7am. You should be as tired as I am.'

Blaine laughed. Had Kurt been thinking about it he would have noticed that this particular morning they were actually acting like a normal loving couple. Blaine shrugged and took a bite of toast. 'I got a new agent. A good one this time.'

Kurt's brows shot up. 'Really? So soon?' He had hoped that perhaps Blaine would consult him, or at least ask his thoughts, on potential agents. After all, Kurt would have to spend time with them as well seeing as he was Blaine's top priority. As it turns out, Blaine hadn't bothered. 'Who is he?'

'His name is Tony. Met him at that charity auction a few months back – you remember that? Anyway, I forgot he was an agent. He is way more experienced than that asshole Jason, and he gets me. I'll be so much better off having him organising everything. You'll love him.'

Kurt's smile had faltered more than a little. He remembered Tony quite well despite only being in his company for a matter of seconds. The smarmy bachelor had been surrounded by a pride of half-wasted, half-dressed girls he had no doubt found working the streets. For some reason, everyone at the late-night charity auction considered this cool and Kurt was left dumbstruck over how big of an arrogant ass the guy was. He hadn't realised Blaine had even laid eyes on him but now it made sense. Lots of sleazy creeps swarmed around Blaine these days, all wanting a taste or a ride to the spotlight. Fortunately Blaine had so far avoided any trashy dealings but Kurt couldn't help but wonder if some of the worrying habits his boyfriend had picked up recently were thanks to the bad company he adamantly kept. Now he wanted one of these lowlifes as an agent? Kurt swallowed hard. It would be hard to refuse the guy entry into his home if he was Blaine's agent. Hell, ex-agent Jason almost became family when he was in their lives. Kurt mentally sighed. He hoped Jason was doing okay. Bang goes the last decent influence Blaine had. Still, Kurt forced the smile back on his face. 'Tony… yeah, I remember him. Great. Let's hope he can live up to your needs and expectations.'

Blaine's eyes narrowed, as if he was trying to discern if Kurt was being sarcastic or genuine. Eventually he realised Kurt was not an idiot and most likely was being sincere. Kurt knew Blaine didn't like it when he was rude. 'Mmm. Speaking of whom, Tony invited us to a rooftop party tonight. I said we'd go.'

'Wait, I was invited?' Kurt suddenly didn't feel well. 'And who would have a rooftop party at this time of year?'

Blaine shrugged. 'He's got to meet you properly some time, right? And this is New York, baby, they don't have weather restrictions here.' He checked his watch as he swiftly pulled on his winter coat. 'Anyway, I gotta go to the set. Be ready by eight; I'll swing by and pick you up.' He took hold of Kurt's chin and steered him forward to press a firm goodbye kiss on his lips.

'Have a good day.' Kurt called after him, deflated. He used to love parties – not that he was invited to many as a kid – but so far New York celebrations had not lived up to the hype. It seems even the wealthiest; most sought-after areas of the city still couldn't suppress drunks, drugs and general terror that thrived in the party environment. Kurt sighed, twisting the mug of coffee in his hands around the breakfast bar. He had a strong feeling he wasn't going to enjoy tonight. 

* * *

><p>To Kurt's earlier question – who would have a rooftop party at this time of year? – it seemed the answer was 'people who can afford to run dozens of high-powered heaters for hours and hours'. Pressed against such a heater, Kurt wondered if anyone would notice if he passed out from the stifling heat. Blaine was still within arm's length so he guessed he would be okay as long as he wasn't still wrapped up in his own private conversation with some of the crew members from the TV show he worked on. Kurt obediently waited behind him armed with a tall glass of strawberry champagne and a set of wary eyes. The rooftop he stood on was filled with easily hundreds of people – none of whom were interested in Kurt at all. They were, however, quite eager to chat with Blaine and spared no thought when they elbowed his boyfriend in the ribs in order to get to him. Ladies and gentlemen – New York's elite class. Kurt sighed and wriggled his way to the edge of the roof. The warmth from the heaters was still very much present but the delightfully cold city breeze was equally as strong and did a good job of cooling the Ohio-born boy. Kurt checked his watch. It wasn't even ten o'clock yet. He groaned. Parties like this usually lived straight on until morning, and at that moment all Kurt wanted to do was take Blaine home and fall asleep on the couch. Perhaps fame and fortune in the Big Apple wasn't what he dreamed of after all if it involved nights like this.<p>

'Hey, Kurt! There you are,' Kurt turned away from the streets below to smile dutifully at Blaine. With him was a broad-shouldered guy with hair too long to be spiked up in the way it was. 'Baby, you remember Tony, right?'

Kurt nodded. 'Yeah, I think we crossed paths a few months ago – it's good to see you again, Tony,' Kurt extended his hand and gave his warmest facial expression he could muster. After all, he wanted to be on good terms with the guy who would be planning Blaine's busy schedule.

Tony barked in laughter. 'Again? Sorry, dude, I meet a lotta people.' He looked Kurt up and down, his eyes not even trying to hide his obvious distaste for him. 'So you're my new boy's housekeeper, huh? Lucky you, being out tonight at a party like this!'

Kurt's eyes widened, insulted. He glanced at Blaine but his boyfriend's eyes were already partly glazed over in tipsiness. If he wasn't going to defend Kurt's honour, then Kurt would! 'Actually, this isn't really my scene.' Kurt replied coolly. 'A tad too crowded and hot for my tastes.'

Tony smirked slightly. 'Yeah all this incredible buzzing atmosphere really does get you down, hmm?' His tone was dripping with sarcasm. He then disdainfully tugged at Kurt's shirt. 'Who comes dressed in this anyway? It's a party, it's gonna get hot!' He and Blaine laughed, and Kurt felt his face heat up even more than it had been before.

'I-I don't like showing skin,' Kurt retorted, folding his arms over his chest defensively.

Blaine gave him a small, knowing smile and stepped up to him, wrapping his arms around his waist and slipping his hands deep into Kurt's jeans pockets. 'Leave him, Tony,' he murmured humorously, 'Kurt is just a little shy. My shy little baby…' Kurt felt even more belittled than before.

Tony pulled a face as Blaine pressed Kurt against the fire escape. 'Yeah, right. Anyway, Blaine, I'll introduce you to those guys I was telling you about. C'mon.' Tony barely looked at Kurt again as he walked off.

Kurt watched Tony warily over Blaine's shoulder, trying not to feel self-conscious that his tipsy lover was softly grinding into him. 'Blaine,' He murmured, 'I don't like him…' He said it in a small, childlike voice in an attempt to not seem stroppy.

Blaine pulled away enough to look into Kurt's eyes. 'What? Because of what he said? Baby, he was just teasing you…'

'I know, but-'

'Kurt, Tony's a great guy. You'll see.' Blaine sounded so patronising Kurt wanted to shove his aroused body away from him. Fortunately, Blaine felt the need to go after his new agent to meet more people. He pressed his lips against Kurt's and stepped away. 'I'll be with him if you need me.'

Kurt tightly folded his arms across his chest again before quickly pulling Blaine back. 'Listen, can we not stay for the whole night? I really don't like it enough to be here till four am.'

Blaine frowned and took Kurt's chin between his fingers. 'We leave when I'm ready to leave, Kurt. Don't be so selfish.' With that, Blaine disappeared leaving Kurt all alone at the fire escape. 

* * *

><p>Hours passed. The glass of strawberry champagne Kurt carried round with him tasted blander with each passing minute, and by the time he had sipped it empty he had no desire to get a refill. Eventually, after several failed attempts to make a friend, Kurt returned to the fire escape and perched between the rings so he could safely watch the nightlife below away from the partygoers. Blaine was nowhere to be found, but Kurt found it hard to care when he felt so miserable. To make matters worse, as it approached midnight Kurt's cell rang. It was his dad who called because he couldn't sleep. Kurt rubbed at his eyes as once again he was forced to confirm that he and Blaine would not be coming back to Ohio for Christmas. Burt didn't get it, and insisted that surely Kurt didn't have to stay in New York if it was Blaine who would be too busy. Kurt shook his head despite the fact his dad couldn't see it. It hurt him so bad knowing his dad was crushed at the news. Kurt couldn't leave Blaine alone in New York to celebrate the holiday alone – what kind of boyfriend would that make him? Then again, what kind of boyfriend would stop their partner from being with their family over Christmas? Speaking to his dad again, especially when he was feeling so alone, was bittersweet. It comforted him to hear Burt's caring voice and he was glad to know his family back in Ohio were doing so well, but he had never felt so isolated and distraught that he couldn't see them. When Burt began expressing how much he and Carole were missing him, Kurt knew he had to get off the phone. With a golf ball-sized lump in his throat, he told his dad he had to go back to the party. They said their goodbyes, and then Kurt clicked off.<p>

He sniffed into the railing and let a couple of stray tears drip off his nose and down into the streets. Suddenly, though, he felt a poke in his back. He swiftly wiped his eyes to hide any trace of weakness and turned around to see Tony. 'Blaine said to go home, straight back to the apartment.'

Kurt blinked. 'What? Where's Blaine?'

Tony looked bored and let his eyes roam lazily over the crowd of people. 'Blaine? He's playing poker with some of the guys downstairs. I've to put you in a taxi, so come on.' He seemed annoyed that he had been given such a menial task, but still he motioned for Kurt to follow him.

'I should go say goodbye, then.'

'No, he's busy.' Tony replied shortly.

'Well, I really think I-'

'Fuck-Kurt, he said go home. If he wanted to say goodbye he would have come himself.' The words stung Kurt, and despite wanting to he couldn't argue back. He was right. Silently, Kurt got in a cab. Tony was already back inside the building before Kurt had even closed the door. He didn't know whether to believe Tony's story. Blaine was not a poker player – hell, he hated card games altogether. So what was he doing? Kurt didn't know, but he allowed himself to be relieved that for him, the night was well and truly over. Or so he had thought. 

* * *

><p>Kurt woke up alarmed when the sound of a girl's shriek echoed through the apartment. He stumbled off the couch where he had been dozing under a blanket, and landed in a heap on the floor. According to his watch it was just after four am. He pulled himself up and followed the sound of what was now female laughter to the hallway. He watched in horror as the front door sat wide open with a girl laying spread-eagled on the hallway floor. Swaying above her was Tony, who was trying to pull the girl up again but was highly unsuccessful.<p>

'What the-?' Kurt couldn't help but feel angry that Tony and some strange woman had just literally fallen into his home. He wished he had kept hold of the blanket as he now felt very bare and vulnerable in his boxers and tank top. 'What are you guys doing? It's four am!'

Tony looked up and burst out laughing at Kurt's distressed face. 'Calm it, doll face, we don't need no talking clock.' The girl gave another shriek of laughter and clawed her way up the wall before leaning against the corner of the hall. Kurt guessed easily that she was a street walker of some sort - and a drunk one at that. Her skimpy red dress had slipped up and down her too-bronzed body enough to reveal lacy black underwear and bra. Kurt couldn't help but be thankful that the girl was in fact wearing underwear at all otherwise he would have been graced with the unholy sight of a full on left breast. 'Hey, Blaine, guess who's still awake!' From behind Tony, Blaine appeared. Kurt drew back instinctively. He knew Blaine had been drinking all night – he could tell from his glassy eyes and subdued behaviour – and past experiences had proven Blaine was very unpredictable by this stage. Kurt watched as Blaine carefully walked down the hall, past Kurt, and into the living room. Kurt was then pushed aside by Tony and the strange floosy as they followed him. 'So, come on, Blaine – where's the liquor?'

Kurt shook his head, and in a slightly panicked tone he said 'No. No, no, no – y-you guys want to drink more you go find another bar.' He hated the apartment, but it was his home and it was not going to be used as an alcohol-induced vomit zone. Tony scoffed at him and stumbled off towards the kitchen in search for drink. The girl laughed more, occasionally pausing as if to be sick, and finally slipped onto the floor again. Kurt stared helplessly. He gently approached Blaine who was slowly taking off his jacket. 'Blaine? Blaine, please make them go…' Blaine turned to Kurt and stared at him with interest but he didn't seem to hear what Kurt was asking. So, Kurt tried again. 'Please – _please _–make them go away. I don't want them in our home like this.'

Kurt's upset voice must have finally broken through Blaine's trance, and surprisingly Blaine complied with his lover's wishes. 'Okay. You,' he pointed at the girl on the floor, and then at Tony as he came back from the kitchen armed with a litre of vodka, 'and you. Go.'

Tony pulled a face. 'What? Dude, it's still early!' Blaine took a step towards him and Tony quickly backed off. Pulling the drunk girl up off the floor, he shot Kurt a pissed off glare. 'Fine, we'll go. There's a nightclub still open down the street. Come on, Claire.'

'My name's Caitlin,' the girl gurgled in protest of being moved.

'Whatever. Let's go.'

Kurt waited in the living room as Blaine made sure their guests left. He sighed in relief when he heard the door close and the lock click into place. Blaine reappeared at the living room doorway, swaying slightly as he resumed watching Kurt. Kurt smiled weakly and approached him, wrapping his arms around him lovingly. 'Thank you…I-I just don't feel comfortable having people like that in our home, y'know?' Blaine didn't answer but his hand smoothed through Kurt's locks. 'You must be so tired. Let's go to bed, hmm?' Kurt took Blaine's hand in his and went to pull him towards their bedroom. But Blaine didn't move. He just stared, transfixed. It was then Kurt realised what was going through Blaine's mind. Before he could utter anything else, Kurt found himself thrust up against the wall. 'Blaine-!'

Blaine moaned in response, grabbing Kurt's hands and pinning them against the wall above his head as his mouth attacked his. His lips skilfully pried Kurt's mouth open so forcefully he was bound to bruise the poor boy. Kurt's mind raced. Out of all the nights for Blaine to choose – he chose tonight. A night Kurt had been suffering through. Kurt was not in the mood for any friskiness, but he knew better than to push Blaine off him. Even if his attempt worked, Blaine was not one to back down from a challenge and his dominating manner normally involved beating Kurt until he complied. Taking heed of lessons learned, Kurt squeezed his eyes shut and let Blaine's tongue ravish his mouth.

Time seemed to slow down and speed up all at once. Blaine's body pressed against his creating red hot friction. Kurt winced. Was he in pain? Too much was going on. All of his senses had sprung into panic mode. Wait – yes, that was definitely pain. His hands. 'Bl-Blaine…' He gasped when he was able to tilt his head away. 'M-my hands – you're being too rough. Let go,' Blaine growled and his hold on Kurt's wrists tightened. Kurt cried out, and foolishly tried wrestling out of his grip. 'Please-! Blaine, you're hurting me!'

Kurt was given a whole second of relief when Blaine let him go, but that was it. He saw Blaine's eyes flash fiercely after being told what to do. His hands pushed against Kurt's chest, striking him back into the wall. From there his hands yanked at Kurt's tank top and practically tore it in two, letting the ripped fabric fall to the floor. 'I'm gonna fuck you,' He growled inches away from Kurt's quivering lips. 'I'm gonna fuck your tight little ass 'cause it's been driving me crazy all night. All night, been thinking of you…'

'Blaine, please don't-' Kurt couldn't finish. Blaine's nails dug into his hips and he found himself dragged into their bedroom. 'Blaine, you're drunk-! You're going to hurt me, please, stop-!'

Blaine ignored his lover's hysterical cries. Tossing Kurt on the bed, he got to undressing himself. The tie Kurt had ever so carefully arranged for him all those hours ago before the party was loosened and pulled over his head and onto the floor. The rest of his clothes soon followed suit. Kurt scrambled up towards the pillows and perched, shaking, in the middle of them as he tried not to panic.

Blaine had promised he would never do this again…he promised… But those eyes – they confirmed Kurt's worst fears. Blaine was too far gone to care. Eying Kurt, the now-naked Blaine smirked. He leaned forward, placing both hands on the mattress. 'C'mere, baby.'

Kurt shook his head weakly. 'You're going to hurt me…I don't want to do it, Blaine, I don't…'

Blaine's gaze hardened. With one swift movement, Blaine jerked Kurt by his leg closer to him. It only took moments until Kurt found himself pinned down with Blaine climbing on top of him. Kurt whimpered as he felt what could only be Blaine's erection digging into him. He squeezed his eyes shut but he could still sense it's length and girth – it frightened him. He knew Blaine was getting off on his fear.

'Shh-shh, baby…' Blaine drawled as his firm hands pushed Kurt around so he was lying on his front. 'Don't' cry. It'll feel so good inside, I swear.' His words were almost mocking – especially when Kurt sensed him fondle his rear. His butt cheeks were wrenched apart so much Kurt's eyes watered. He continued to sob into the sheets helplessly and Blaine rewarded his lack of fight by lightly fingering his entrance. Kurt knew there was no going back now. Blaine had made his decision. He knew what he wanted, and now he was going to get it. All he had to do was pretend it wasn't happening and wait until it was over.

Blaine shifted. Kurt's eyes flew open. Blaine was positioning himself already. 'W-wait, Blaine! You can't-!' Blaine's smirk grew. He knew why Kurt was panicking. In the bedside drawer sat a tube full of lube, and Blaine's expert fingers were more than capable of preparing the boy for what was to come. But Blaine was deciding to not use them. Kurt strained to look back at him. He begged Blaine not to do it. He remembered the last time Blaine had taken him raw, and the memory of the pain was enough to make him scream. 'Please! Please, I-I can't take it-! You _know_ I can't!'

Blaine once again ignored him. Truth be known, Blaine had always loved taking Kurt like this. Without stretching him and without the aid of lube, fucking Kurt had never felt so good. He took a fistful of Kurt's hair and forced his head back so Kurt had no choice but to jerk into him. It was then Blaine pushed inside.

Kurt screamed.

Blaine's eyes shut as he tried to cope with feeling Kurt all around him. The boy was so small and tight; the way his body tensed felt so incredible Blaine could have come there and then. But he managed not to. Panting already, he drew out again and thrust back inside. He only stopped when he was fully sheathed and there he stayed for many moments to simply savour the sensation. Every inch of his member sizzled in desirable bliss. Beneath him, Kurt cried and shook in pain. He could feel Blaine deep inside him and could almost hear himself tearing as his muscles were taken by surprise. He tried moving one way then another but nothing gave him any form of reprieve. Salty tears ran down his nose and onto the bed sheets creating a darkened circle of dampness whilst the hand grasping his hair kept him in place; taut and at the mercy of the other boy's wishes. Kurt lost count of how many times Blaine slammed into him. The agony was not dwindling and the loud pleasured obscenities uttered by Blaine only shamed Kurt more. What kind of man was he if he wasn't able to stop this? Kurt remembered his dad's comforting voice from earlier but now it sounded hollow. What would his dad think? No, no he couldn't think of that. He couldn't. Everything was just too much – too painful, and things began to go out of focus.

Blaine came harder than he ever had before. He jerked into the smaller boy one last time and let his juices fill Kurt to the point his rear leaked. He slowly pulled out, enjoying every last wave of pleasure flow through his body. He panted against Kurt's arched back, occasionally kissing his sweat-drenched skin before finally releasing him.

Kurt fell forward, unconscious. 

* * *

><p>By the time Blaine woke up it was well past noon. He rolled onto his back, finding his bare legs tangled between the sheets and his pillow on top of his head. He blinked and allowed his eyes time to adjust to the light from the afternoon sun. Blaine then realised he was alone. Kurt was nowhere to be seen but the unmistakable scent of freshly ground coffee gave him a fairly good idea where his gorgeous lover was. Donning a pair of briefs, he followed the smell to the kitchen and was not surprised to find Kurt there, sitting on his usual chair by the breakfast bar.<p>

'Afternoon, sunshine.' Blaine yawned as he helped himself to a cup of coffee Kurt had prepared. He sipped it and found that it wasn't as hot as he had expected. How long ago had Kurt got up? He might have reprimanded Kurt for not having a boiling hot cup ready for him but he decided to let him off considering how amazing he had made Blaine feel the night before. Blaine smirked, noting how carefully Kurt perched on his stool. He had obviously done a little more damage than usual. He glanced back towards the bedroom. He hadn't noticed if Kurt had bled. He hoped not. For some reason blood was not as much a turn on in the harsh light of day. It was then Blaine realised Kurt had not said anything. 'How is my angel this morning?' He cooed, stepping up behind Kurt and gently brushing his hair back. His actions were met with a sudden jump and his hand was pushed away.

'Don't touch me.'

Blaine's eyes hardened. 'Excuse me?'

Kurt sniffed. Blaine hadn't realised he had been crying. 'Don't…touch me.' He repeated, this time with a shaky breath breaking up his words.

Blaine was undeterred. He circled his arms around Kurt's slim waist despite the smaller boy's attempts to push him off. 'Baby, don't be like this. Are you still upset about last night or-?'

'Yes!' Kurt's shout made Blaine back off. Kurt had never spoken to him like this before. Blaine watched as Kurt slipped off the stool and began pacing back and forth, tears splashing off his face and landing on the tiled flooring. 'I am still upset, okay? No-no, that isn't even it. I'm upset about-about everything! I can't live like this anymore, Blaine, I just can't…'

'Baby, what are you-'

'Don't call me that!' Kurt cried accusingly, his tone bordering on hysterical. 'D-Don't, okay? I'm sick a-and fed up being afraid. I don't enjoy being afraid. I don't like feeling worthless and used.' Kurt stopped and finally faced Blaine head on. It was a stand, sure, but Blaine could see the meekness in his eyes. He was guarding himself; he was well aware Blaine could sense how desperate and vulnerable he was. Blaine knew he could gain control over him again. He slowly approached Kurt and calmly settled his floundering arms so that they were gently pressed against his sides. 'Stop it, Blaine – I said don't touch me!'

'Kurt, look at me.' Blaine said sternly. Kurt did so. 'You want me to apologise for last night? Fine. Okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I hurt you.'

Kurt stared at him, obviously not expecting such an admission. But he knew that wasn't enough. Not now. 'You keep doing it, though.' He whimpered, leaning his forehead against Blaine's. 'You keep hurting me and you won't stop-'

'I will.'

'You say that and then you don't-'

'Kurt. Listen to me.' Blaine murmured, wondering how long this would take before he could get down to some wake-up friskiness. 'I said I'm sorry. I won't do it again. I love you, Kurt, I don't want you to be scared.' There was a pause. A silence between them. Kurt closed his eyes and nodded against Blaine as he took a shuddering breath. Blaine tried not to smirk. Kurt had shaken him up a little there, but as he expected the feeble beauty couldn't defy him. Blaine knew he was back in the driving seat. Or, at least he did until-

'Blaine…if this happens one more time – once more…' Kurt swallowed hard, his eyes still shut, 'I'm gone. And I mean it.'

'Shh, shh…' Blaine cradled his lover's head so close Kurt could not see how wide and alarmed the ex-Warbler's eyes had become. He was dumbstruck. Was Kurt really threatening to leave him? Any other day, any other time, Blaine would have punished Kurt for such a statement. He would have had him crushed against the refrigerator, pummelled his weak stomach with his fists or threatened to burn all his beloved photos in front of him. Anything; as long as Kurt knew he was going nowhere. But now it was different. It was not a panic-driven warning, it was one of promise. Kurt was serious. Had Blaine really pushed him too far last night? 'Let's not talk like that, hmm?'

Kurt sniffed. 'I mean it. I don't want to go, but I can't live like this with all your rules, what you do… Not if you don't keep your word-'

'I know.' Blaine's tone was too harsh and quick, so he calmed himself. 'I understand. I promise you, baby, I'll do anything to keep you with me.'

And that was true. Blaine would do anything to keep Kurt with his, but the fire in his eyes betrayed his raging heart. How could Kurt threaten to leave him? Blaine had to make sure he stayed with him – even if it meant taking away every other option. 

* * *

><p>A.N. A tad ambiguous, I know! Still, please review – what do you think Blaine will do? =D<p> 


	4. Playing by the Rules

A.N. Hi guys! So this chapter had so many redrafts I hardly remember what the story is about now! Still trying to decide how this story should end and I'll have to choose soon as the pivotal chapter isn't too far ahead. I will admit, I wrote most of it during the hours of 2am and 5am so I'm pretty much typing five words every minute. So tired…

This chapter totally takes off in another direction – Blaine knows he's losing control of Kurt and needs to do something about it. Nothing exciting in this part I'm afraid but I hope you enjoy it anyway and give me some insight as to what you expect to happen!

Thank you so much for your awesome reviews! They are so encouraging.

* * *

><p><strong>Playing by the Rules<strong>

Blaine had kept his promise. He had kept his promise for almost two weeks now. And – _God_! – it was killing him!

He clenched his jaw and let his eyes glaze over as he thought deeply. His whole body felt tense and seemed to buzz with pent up energy he knew he couldn't release. He had been so good these last couple of weeks. He had stopped drinking altogether so that his heart never directed his actions, like it normally did. He made regular trips to the gym so he could fire some anger-driver thumps into the inanimate punching bag to pacify his habits. Kurt didn't know about that, of course, and was under the impression Blaine was seeing a doctor about his 'problem' when in fact he was donning boxing gloves. As for Kurt, he was now allowed outside the apartment most days during the hours Blaine wasn't at home. Unbeknownst to him, Blaine had his ways of knowing where he was exactly at every moment. But as far as Kurt was concerned, Blaine was coming through for him at last and they were making huge progress together.

Of course, Blaine couldn't curb his habits completely. In an attempt to maintain some form of control he sometimes tried intimidating Kurt in other less obvious ways. When Kurt let himself be held, Blaine wrapped his arms around him so tight Kurt was reminded of the fact Blaine was still much stronger than him. Other times, he would take his lover's hand and clutch at it so he could control where Kurt went. He hadn't actually _hurt_ him, per se, but he did catch Kurt wince occasionally. Blaine had to admit he felt more than a little smug at that. For now, Blaine's efforts were appreciated but the trouble was that eventually Kurt would call him out on all the little things he now did in order to scare him. Kurt would want him to stop altogether. Blaine wasn't sure he could. For as long as he could remember he had always exercised power over others; his parents, his pets, his schoolmates and his lovers – all people he could manipulate though his words or actions. Kurt had been the easiest because he believed everything Blaine told him and was as feeble as hell! Now it seemed the tables were turning, and Blaine knew if he didn't do something about it soon, he'd snap. And then he'd lose Kurt forever.

Kurt. Blaine's blood boiled when he remembered his threat of leaving. Where would he go? Back to Ohio? Or would he get another place in the city? Blaine wasn't sure which was worse. Sure, if he went back home it would be difficult for Blaine to make him his again. How could he hold down his TV show in New York and seduce the boy all the way in Lima? But if he stayed in New York… A talented boy like Kurt would surely be snapped up by some high-flier and get the lead role in a huge Broadway production in a heartbeat. Hello never-ending stardom! Don't get Blaine wrong, he didn't necessarily want to deny Kurt success…he just wanted to control it. Limit it. He needed Kurt to still need him. And thanks to Kurt's recent outburst, those ideals were slowly slipping away. Kurt _needed _to be controlled, and despite months and months of preparing him to accept Blaine as his head, if Kurt wanted to leave then Blaine would no longer be able to exercise power over him. The thought drove Blaine insane. So insane, Blaine now rushed home fearing Kurt would be gone when he got there, hastily seeking him out before relaxing in Kurt's confused but comforting arms. Blaine didn't want it to be like this.

What had Blaine done that was so bad anyway? He had never put Kurt in hospital. He hadn't permanently scarred him or broken many bones - and even when he did he always kissed them better afterwards! Blaine gave Kurt the best of everything – food, clothes, and a home in Manhattan – did he really have any right to complain? Blaine had to give up that argument the moment he thought it. He knew the real answer. Deep down, he knew what he's done to Kurt is more than he's willing to admit out loud.

He felt a slight twinge of shame. It wasn't healthy, this obsession of his. But he couldn't help it. There was something about Kurt's face when it was torn in pain and fear that just – that just… stirred something deep inside Blaine's depths like a beast red hot in desire. Blaine tried to stop thinking about it, but both his heart and his crotch seemed to swell at the image of Kurt, weak and broken beneath him. Those eyes brimming with tears. Those lips forming silent words of pleading. Those fingers clutching at the bed sheets or grasping uselessly for Blaine to stop. But Blaine knew he could never stop – not really…

'Jesus, Blaine, have you heard a word I've said?'

It was as if Blaine's hearing had been on mute and was suddenly switched up to full volume. The sound of the busy café – people chatting, machines humming, coffee mugs clinking – it all caught him by surprise despite that he had been sitting in it for the best part of half an hour. Across the table from him, Tony watched him with searching eyes. Blaine gave his head a quick shake and offered an apologetic smile. 'Sorry, what was that last part?'

Tony frowned, deflated. 'It doesn't matter.' He took a slip of his coffee, leading Blaine to do so too. 'So, has that baby of yours demanded a Christmas tree yet?'

Blaine's eyes flashed over the rim of the mug but he calmly settled his coffee down before responding. 'We ordered one months ago. It'll arrive soon.' That reminded him, he'd need to start seriously considering gift ideas for Kurt, after all he didn't want all his efforts to go to waste over thoughtless presents.

'I swear, sometimes that boy has you wrapped around his little elfish finger.' Tony pulled a face. 'Imagine ordering a tree…'

'It was my idea. Kurt wanted to spend a day looking for the 'perfect tree', but I thought it was a waste of time.'

Tony then nodded, suddenly changing tune. 'Oh, yeah, putting it like that, sure. Good thinking.' They sat in silence again. Tony had noticed a change in his favourite client, and he didn't like it. He secretly wondered if he was getting any action at home. Trust Kurt not to put out… He cleared his throat. 'Listen, I'm having a Christmas Eve party – you gotta be there. Gonna hire a club, dancers – the best of New York is gonna be there.'

Blaine was already shaking his head. 'I can't.'

'What? Fuck! Why not?'

Blaine frowned. Truthfully, he couldn't risk getting drunk again. After last time he had torn Kurt apart worse than he ever had done before, and with all his pent up aggression he couldn't let himself slip. Not yet. 'I just can't.'

Tony cursed again. 'But, man, Barry Jake is gonna be there!'

'Barry Jake? No way,' Blaine looked sceptical, 'there's no way his wife would let him party Christmas Eve. He has a family, remember?'

Tony shook his head. 'Getting divorced.' He stated. 'Been in the works for over a year now. Poor guy, trapped in a marriage all this time. Worst part is he'll never really be free, will he? Even without the kids, divorces are messy. There's always that slimy connection.'

Blaine stared. 'What do you mean?'

Tony shrugged, stirring his coffee absentmindedly. 'Take it from someone who's parents divorced – it doesn't matter how hard you try, you'll never really be free from someone you marry. A wedding might as well be a gunshot to the head.' He mimicked being shot, earning many disapproving looks from some people at nearby tables. He grinned. 'Get what I mean?'

Ever so slowly, Blaine smiled back. The smile then transpired into a smirk. 'Oh, yeah, I think I do.'

* * *

><p>Kurt had to remind himself not to move when he heard the front door open. Before, he would have to greet Blaine like a dog greets its master but thanks to the breakthrough he had a couple of weeks ago he could act like a normal human being again. Still, he twisted on the couch so he could smile warmly at his boyfriend when he entered the room.<p>

'Hey, baby,' Blaine eyed him as he removed his coat. It seemed Blaine was still getting used to it too. 'Been busy?'

Kurt stretched and turned off the television. 'Not really, except we now have our tree.' He smiled and pointed over to where the living room wall met one side of the wall-length window. In the corner stood the tall, lusciously leafy Christmas tree Blaine had ordered for them. Kurt had decorated most of it already, saving a couple of ornaments and the top-of-the-tree star for Blaine to finish it off. Blaine gave a low whistle, and Kurt pulled him up to get a better look. 'I know. It's huge, right?'

Blaine grinned as he arranged the final ornaments and hoisted himself up using a chair to place the star on the tip. 'It is. I guess I did good, huh?'

Kurt nodded. 'You did good.'

Blaine wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist securely from behind. As usual, Kurt tensed up and took many long seconds to finally sink into his lover's embrace. Blaine then rested his chin on his boyfriend's neck and together they gazed at the beautiful Christmas display before them. 'Now all we need is some presents to go underneath, hmm?'

Kurt wriggled in his arms, obviously smiling. 'Presents would be nice. I was thinking of shopping for you tomorrow, actually. I've left it to the last minute as usual.'

Blaine tried not to think about his Kurt walking out on the New York streets without him. 'I don't need anything, baby, I'd rather I was able to fill the bottom of the tree with things for you. I like giving you things.'

Kurt hummed and rested back, being easily held up. 'I know you do, but I want to get you things too.'

'What if I already got you something?'

'Hmm? Have you?' Kurt tilted his head to look at Blaine. 'I guess I'll just have to wait until the 25th, won't I?'

'Oh, I'd rather I just give it to you now…' Kurt wasn't able to tell what kind of 'present' Blaine had for him. Was this the beginning of foreplay? Sweat began forming at Kurt's temples. He had managed to avoid getting sexually intimate with Blaine since…that last time. He wasn't sure his body had healed yet. Surely Blaine would let Kurt make the first move, right? Fortunately, his mind was put to rest as Blaine suddenly produced a thick white envelope and held it out in front of Kurt for him to take. 'I think if you waited until the 25th then my present would be useless.'

Kurt hesitantly took the envelope and felt it carefully. There was no real obvious clue as to what it was. Was it just a letter? In fact, a letter would be nice. A love letter, especially. 'Should I open it now?' He felt Blaine nod, his head still resting on Kurt's shoulder. With slightly shaking hands, he fidgeted with the envelope until he could pull out the contents. The first piece of paper was a handwritten note from Blaine:

_To the heavenly beautiful love of my life,_

_I want to make you happy._

_I think this will do it._

Kurt felt himself being squeezed around the waist. He let out an excited giggle despite not knowing what the note meant. The last of the envelopes contents matched – two sets of boarding passes between JFK Airport, New York to Dayton International Airport, Ohio. Kurt stopped breathing as he registered what this meant. 'Bl-Blaine, what-?'

'You didn't really believe we weren't going home for the holidays, did you?' Blaine murmured teasingly in his ear.

Kurt felt his eyes well up in tears and his heart began pounding hard in excitement. 'A-are you _serious_?' He turned in Blaine's arms so he could stare at him. 'We're really going back to Ohio?'

Blaine grinned smugly at him. 'Unless you suddenly don't want to.'

'I want to!' Kurt confirmed quickly, as if the boarding passes would disintegrate in his hands if he didn't say it fast enough. He let out a joyful squeal and jumped into Blaine's arms, crying out 'thank you!' over and over until it was just a jumble of sounds.

Blaine laughed, picking his lover up off the ground and carrying him towards the bedroom. He continued to assure Kurt that surprising him was his plan all along, and that Blaine would never be cruel enough to deny Kurt the Christmas he wanted. Kurt seemed too dazed to believe him at first, but gradually he nodded and accepted that Blaine must be telling the truth. And before Kurt could break the great news to his dad, Blaine made sure he showed his appreciation by letting Blaine taste him again. Kurt could only comply.

* * *

><p>The smile hardly moved from Kurt's face in the days leading up to their departure date. December 23rd till December 29th. Kurt was getting to spend all of Christmas with his family. Of course, there was New Year to think about but Blaine insisted they enter the New Year in New York City, their home now. Kurt agreed – after all, Christmas was the holiday he really cared about – and he wanted to thank Blaine any way he could. The afternoon of their flight seemed to glow despite the miserable weather. Kurt dug out the winter clothes Carole had knitted them and Blaine was kind enough to agree to wear the woollen atrocities in public. Mitten-in-mitten, they left the apartment for the airport and their hands remained intertwined all the way through to the departure lounge.<p>

'Doesn't Christmas just fill you with warmth?' Kurt asked cheerfully as he admired the tea lights draped along the long waiting area. He snuggled further into Blaine's side as they took a seat near their gate.

Blaine hummed noncommittally in response. 'I guess.' Kurt pouted, and poked Blaine's cheek playfully. Blaine's head whipped round to face him and Kurt noted the sharpness in his eyes. He instinctively let go of Blaine's hand and watched as Blaine controlled his gaze until it was soft and loving. 'Yes,' His voice now smothered in sweetness. 'Especially when I get to spend every second with you.'

Kurt offered a smile as Blaine kissed him, but he knew he had just caught a glimpse of the old Blaine. It wasn't resurfacing now, was it? 'I'll go get us snacks for the flight.' Kurt replied, and causally stood and walked over to the shopping area before Blaine could object. He could feel Blaine's eyes on him with every step he took. Even as he entered the first store and walked out of sight, he knew Blaine's eyes were searching for him.

Blaine was giving him the Christmas he wanted. Blaine had kept his promise not to hurt Kurt anymore – sure it had only been a few weeks but those would have been the hardest. Kurt knew he should feel thankful and blissful - and to some extent he did feel that way - but if Kurt was being truly honest with himself, his heart felt fooled. The nagging sensation in the pit of his stomach would not go away. Everything was too good, too perfect. Blaine was back to his old loving self, or at least he seemed to be, and Kurt's scars were healing inside and out. But this was Blaine he was talking about. Blaine was smart, calculated. He could control a situation like a puppeteer would his doll on its string.

Kurt gave a frustrated sigh. He had to stop thinking like this. He couldn't keep suspecting Blaine of plotting something – it just wasn't fair to him now he was trying so hard to be good. He bought some snacks and headed back towards Blaine. Up until now he had still felt those eyes watching him but as he approached the raven haired boy he found that he was now staring at something – or someone – else.

'You okay?' Kurt asked, sitting down next to him again. He followed his gaze. Across the gate sat a small boy playing with a toy train. He ran his train up and down the armrest of his seat and made cute little 'choo-choo' noises in the process. 'Blaine?'

'You ever think about kids, baby?'

That shocked him. 'Kids?' Kurt repeated. 'What, for us?'

Blaine hummed, nodding. His deep dark eyes appeared to be gazing longingly in the child's direction. 'Yeah, for us. In the future.'

'I guess. In the future.' Kurt bit his lip, unsure what he was supposed to say. 'Kids would be nice.'

Blaine smiled vaguely. 'Yeah, they would.' He then turned back to look at Kurt and took his hand. 'First class passengers can board now. Let's go, baby.'

Kurt simply nodded and allowed Blaine to lead him onto the plane.

Just what was going on in Blaine's head?

* * *

><p>A.N. Thank you for reading! What do you think will happen? Do you like this calculated Blaine or the dangerous one from before? What do you want Kurt to do? Please review!<p> 


	5. Christmas in Ohio

A.N. I. Hate. Writer's. Block. Sort of backed myself into a literacy corner by not planning ahead, meaning it has taken me this long to figure out how to proceed without ruining the story. This chapter takes place in Ohio and I think by the next update Blaine and Kurt will be back in New York where we can get more dangerousBlaine! Why is it everyone seems to love dangerousBlaine? Okay, so Blaine behaves himself in this chapter but I think a couple of cracks show so we all know he isn't going to be good for much longer. I've tried – that is, tried – to insert some humour in here with some Finn and Rachel business just to lighten the mood. But I find it so boring to write so hopefully I'll get back to some gritty darkness in the next chapter. =D

Sorry this chapter was so rushed - I'm not going to have constant internet access from tomorrow and I really wanted to update this fic tonight. Please read and review, ask questions, give suggestions and so on – I like receiving help! 

* * *

><p><span>Christmas in Ohio<span> 

Finn had grown a beard. A full-on, face destroying beard.

'Oh my God, Finn,' Kurt murmured into his hand as he stared at his step brother, 'What did you do?'

Finn shifted uncomfortably under Kurt's intense gaze. 'I thought you'd like it. You said yourself, Johnny Depp looked better with some facial hair.'

Kurt nodded. 'Sure, but Finn…you aren't Johnny Depp. You need to shave that thing off before it comes alive and kills us all.' Beside Finn, Rachel let out a quiet snort of laughter and apologetically petted her boyfriend's arm.

'No way!' Finn admonished, shaking his head furiously. 'I like how I look. And Rachel likes it too. Right, Rachel?'

He looked down to Rachel, who immediately smiled encouragingly back at him. 'Of course, I love it. I love all your looks.' Satisfied, Finn left the front hallway to the kitchen and completely missed her 'Hell no, I don't like it!' expression which was subtly directed to Kurt.

Kurt laughed, only now realising just how much he had missed being home. Despite not being in this hallway since the day he moved out, everything seemed to be exactly how he remembered it. Familiarity was a beautiful thing. The house was warm and the scent of roasted potatoes and chicken filled Kurt's nostrils so much so his mouth began to water. Christmas songs played on the radio in the living room next to a scantily decorated Christmas tree. Obviously Burt and Carole wanted everyone to take part in the decorations. Speaking of Carole, Kurt was suddenly blindsided by his step mother who had only just realised Kurt was back.

'Honey, oh Kurt, honey it is so good to have you home!' She beamed up at him. Kurt hugged her back tightly and only let her go at the sound of Blaine and Burt bringing in the last of their luggage.

'Seriously, Kurt, why did you think it was appropriate to bring all these cases?' Burt asked as he wiped his brow. 'Don't get me wrong, I'm glad to have you home but you're not even here a week – do you really need so much clothes?'

Blaine clapped Burt's shoulder. 'Sorry, that's my fault. I told him to bring everything he thought he would need since stores would be closed.'

Kurt smiled and let himself be pulled into Blaine's arms. Burt sighed and nodded in resignation. 'As long as I'm not hauling it all back to the airport when you leave, I don't mind.'

Everyone laughed, and Finn returned from the kitchen eating a freshly cooked chicken leg. As Carole and Rachel reprimanded him for not waiting until dinner, Kurt snuggled into Blaine's side. This was perfect. Everything – the snow falling, the holiday tunes, the atmosphere, his family – this was the Christmas he wanted. He discreetly placed a kiss on Blaine's neck feeling like all those bad times were in the past. What had he been worried about? 

* * *

><p>When Blaine felt the kiss pressing on his neck, it took all his willpower to stop the smirk rising to his lips. Kurt was happy and that was all that mattered right now. He had to make sure things stayed like this if he wanted the next few days to bode well. He caught Burt subtly watching them, so he 'discreetly' nuzzled into Kurt and murmured some sweet nothings in his ear. He continued to make small romantic gestures in Burt's presence for the rest of the night and Kurt's elated reactions were perfect. By the time they were all heading to bed Burt was happy enough to let his son and his boyfriend sleep in Kurt's old bedroom in the basement.<p>

_This is easier than I thought_.

The following day brought about a mad rush of action. With Christmas less than 24 hours away, Blaine had no choice but to join Kurt's family (and Rachel) in decorating the house and preparing the food for Christmas dinner. Seeing as he hadn't properly cooked or cleaned since arriving in New York, Blaine grew frustrated and finally excused himself using the excuse he wanted to visit some cousins living nearby. By the time he returned he had walked off the effects of alcohol from a local bar and was just in time to join the Hudson-Hummel clan for some eggnog and spirits.

Thank God I found that bar earlier, he thought as he declined a second glass. He needed to be sober in this house. His eyes drifted to Kurt, who was busy going through Finn's baby photos with Rachel. Kurt was such a good boy. Blaine's eyes narrowed. As he explained his plan to Tony a few days ealier, his agent put forward the question: What's so special about Kurt anyway? The answer, quite honestly, was how beautiful he was – inside and out. It was corny but it was how Blaine truly felt about him. He was special; no one else in the world came anywhere close to him. Blaine liked that. Kurt was a gentle but determined soul, with a good moral conscience that Blaine could not fully comprehend. Kurt was sexy without knowing it; his plump lips and delicate features were worthy of constant admiration and his eyes were wide and innocent like a child. And his voice…God, Blaine loved his voice. When he spoke, when he sang, when he screamed… Blaine squeezed his eyes shut to avoid going down that road. He'd have to save it for when they were back in New York and a long way away from Finn or Burt.

Burt. Blaine looked over to the patriarch of the family. Kurt definitely inherited his father's loving nature, that much was obvious, but thankfully his physical features came more from his mother. Burt was the next part of the plan. Of course, Blaine could still go ahead without him but it would be so much easier with Burt on his side. All he needed now was to have Burt alone.

'Baby, have another drink.'

Kurt looked up at Blaine and was a little surprised when a full glass of eggnog was pushed his way. Blaine nodded as if to say 'It's okay, I want you to.' before Kurt finally accepted it. As the night went on, Blaine continued to refill Kurt's drink as the other boy's attention was elsewhere. By ten o'clock, after Carole had gone upstairs and Finn left to take Rachel home, Kurt had practically passed out on the couch. Blaine took on the role as the loving boyfriend and carried his lover to bed, returning to find Burt cleaning up the mess Finn had left in the kitchen.

'I should have known he'd conk out after drinking all that eggnog.' Burt said brightly, wiping the counter. 'How is he, anyway?'

Blaine chuckled. 'He's fine. I left him tucked up in bed. I only hope he doesn't drool on my pillow.'

Burt laughed and shrugged. 'Risks like that come with the territory, I'm afraid.'

Blaine watched as the older man finished up cleaning and he knew this was his shot. 'Listen, I'm glad I've finally got the chance to speak to you. Alone.' Burt turned round to face him, his eyes curious. Blaine put on his most sincere expression and tried to appear nervous. 'There was something I wanted to say – or ask. You see, sir, I love your son. Kurt is my world. I'd do anything to be with him a-and because of that…'

Burt's eyes grew wide as Blaine pulled out a ring box from his pocket. 'Holy crap…'

'I-I know it's very clichéd asking you this, especially on Christmas Eve, but…' Blaine offered a small smile as he opened the ring box to show off the diamond white-gold engagement ring. 'I want to marry Kurt. And I would mean a lot to me and your son if we had your blessing.'

Silence ensued. For a split second, Blaine doubted himself. If Burt said no it would really put a damper on his plans, and possibly lead to Blaine's failure. Fortunately for him, Burt then tackled him in an emotion-filled bear-hug. 'Ah, kiddo, you had my blessing the first time Kurt brought you home.'

'Sir, I am so glad to hear you say that.' Blaine's words sounded heartfelt, but his eyes peering out from behind Burt's shoulder betrayed the fact he felt more triumphant than grateful. 'I'd really appreciate it if you could help me. I want to ask him tomorrow.'

Burt was sniffing so much Blaine was truly thankful he couldn't see the man's tearful face. 'Of course I will, anything – Anything for my future son-in-law.'

Blaine smirked into Burt's shoulder. 

* * *

><p>Kurt awoke to the sound of Sinatra's iconic <em>Let It Snow<em> playing in his room. His attempts to sing along were more like grumbles as his hangover quickly made itself known. Why did Blaine let him drink so much? The better question would have been why did Blaine let him drink at all but Kurt could barely form any words for the first hour of being awake. However, the Christmas spirit soon overtook him and, a couple of aspirin later, Kurt was dancing away as he helped prepare Christmas breakfast. Everyone had to wait until Finn finally rolled out of bed before they could get to their presents. Kurt opened up Blaine's gift to him and found in his hands the gorgeous pair of shoes he had admired that day he had been chased home by the paparazzi. He pounced on his boyfriend, kissing him all over in glee.

Blaine just laughed under his breath, promising that there were more presents waiting for him under their tree in New York.

A little while later, Blaine excused himself to go visit his family for a few hours and insisted Kurt stay to help with dinner. As Kurt peeled potatoes in his brand-spanking new shoes, his father came up behind him. 'Looking like a true New York fashion icon, there, Kurt. They look expensive.'

Kurt smiled. 'Trust me when I say you do not want to know how much these cost. I don't want you having another heart attack.'

Burt raised his eyebrows and accepted Kurt's words. 'Blaine must really want you to be happy, spending all that money on shoes like that. You know you can get a nice pair in Walmart for ten bucks but-'

'-It's not about the money, dad,'

'I know, I know.' Burt raised his hands up. 'I'm just saying that Blaine obviously loves you very much. The guy's barely gone five minutes without playing with your hair, holding your hand, smiling-'

Kurt looked up from the potatoes. 'What are you saying, dad?' His tone was a little defensive.

'I'm saying that it really makes me happy to see you and Blaine together.' Burt smiled warmly, and patted his son on the back. 'It reminds me of your mother and me, and now me with Carole. I can see you both living happily together for a very long time.'

With that, Burt left the kitchen. Kurt stopped what he was doing to consider what had just happened. His dad certainly was not one to shy away from personal conversations, but never before had he admitted just how happy he was with Blaine. Sure, he had never given Kurt any reason to suspect that he didn't like him but now it was all out in the open and Kurt couldn't decide how he felt. Of course he was thrilled to hear at last that Burt was content with Kurt and Blaine's relationship, but part of him couldn't help but feel a little guilty at hiding what Blaine had done to him in New York over the last few months. It felt like he was lying to his dad and it didn't sit well with him at all.

_Come on, Kurt, get over it. All relationships struggle at one time or another – no one needs to know about what happened before_.

The voice in his head calmed Kurt's nerves and shortly after he had almost forgotten the conversation he had with his dad.

* * *

><p>Blaine arrived back home just as dinner was being served in mid-afternoon. Kurt lost himself in the sea of laughter, eating and pulling of Christmas crackers and took photo after photo so that he could take the memories home with him. After dinner, Rachel arrived and insisted (with Kurt's help) that everyone watch <em>The Wizard of Oz <em>before settling down by the fireplace.

The day seemed to have flown by too quickly for Kurt. It was the day he had been waiting for since leaving Ohio and now that it was almost over he felt a little let down that in a matter of hours it would be a whole year before Christmas came round again. His depressed thoughts were disturbed, however, when Burt commented that there was still one present under the tree. His interest spiked, Kurt straightened up on the couch he was sharing with Carole. He was fairly certain no presents had been left since that morning.

'Who is it for?' Rachel asked, trying not to seem too eager for a last-minute gift.

'Kurt.' Burt replied, pulling out a tiny brown package from beneath the tree.

'Me?' Kurt got up and tentatively took the package in his hands. It was tied up tightly with string, and Kurt had to laugh. 'Brown paper packages tied up with string, these are a few of my favourite things.' He sang. As he untied the gift he was moved to the centre of the living room in front of everyone.

'What is it, Kurt? Who is it from?'

'Rachel, shh! Let Kurt open the thing before you ask questions.'

Kurt ignored the voices and became more interested as he tore away at the brown paper to find a box made out of tin foil. He laughed a bit and took off the lid of the small box. Inside were a note and a girly toy ring. Kurt frowned a little. What the hell? He lifted the note to his eyes.

'Turn around.' He read. He looked up at his family, confused, before slowly turning around to see if there was anything behind him. He gasped 'Oh my God…'

Blaine smiled up at him from his one-kneed position on the floor. In his outstretched palm lay an opened ring box. The ring perched inside sparkled as if it was electrified or something, but was still classical in appearance – the type Kurt had only ever dreamed of seeing in real life. And here it was being offered to him in his parent's living room. 'Kurt?'

Kurt blinked, his legs threatening to give way if he so much as shivered. 'Uhh…huh?'

Blaine's eyes flashed at seeing his boyfriend so flustered. 'Baby, give me your hand.' He commanded in a low, gentle voice before taking Kurt's motionless hand in his. 'I've wanted to ask you this almost since the second we first got together. I love you, and I know I've messed up in the past but I promise you now never to let you down again. I promise to love and cherish you, make you happy and take care of you for the rest of my life. So…I would be honoured if you would marry me.'

Kurt's breathing stopped. No matter how hard he fought for air, his body wouldn't respond. His mind raced but seemed blank at the same time. Chills ran up his spine but his face burned hot. He felt so exposed but lost inside his own consciousness. He could feel the eyes of everyone in the room on him and finally he managed to break free from whatever trance he had been in. 'Y-yes?' He responded quietly. He wasn't even sure if Blaine had actually asked him. But that's what they do in movies, right? Say yes?

It must have been the right thing to say because suddenly Rachel's perfectly-pitched squeal erupted from her and the room filled with cheers of happiness. Kurt wanted to look back at them and see their smiling faces but his eyes could not shift from Blaine's gaze. Why did he feel so unsettled? Blaine Anderson – the boy Kurt has been hopelessly in love with for years wanted to marry him – Kurt Hummel. Kurt should be crying with joy right now but instead he felt nervous, as if there was a joke going on that he wasn't privy to. It was then, as Blaine got up from the floor and slid the ring smoothly onto Kurt's finger, that Kurt saw it. Blaine's loving, hopeful smile had transformed in a smug, triumphant grin. Kurt couldn't help but feel he had been duped. 

* * *

><p>Before, Kurt had worried that the evening would pass too quickly, but now it seemed like time was standing still. His dad and Carole were making numerous toasts in the newly-engaged couple's honour, slowly getting themselves drunk in the process. Finn was finishing off the last of the food left over from dinner, and Rachel was already planning a playlist of music Kurt and Blaine should play at their wedding. Kurt tried to stay focused on the conversation but found his attention straying to the massive rock on his finger. The ring was too beautiful for words, and Kurt almost felt embarrassed about it. Beside him, Blaine too was trying to make it look as if he was involved in the conversation but he was repeatedly distracted by text messages on his cell phone.<p>

'Seriously, Kurt, I know you've talked about having a Lifehouse song playing for your first dance as a married couple but it's so overdone – you need to find something unique.' Rachel advised, just seconds of announcing herself as their official wedding planner.

'Rachel, we just got engaged.' Kurt laughed nervously. 'I don't think we need to think about wedding songs just yet.'

Blaine hummed in response, and Kurt tensed at the controlling tone he used. 'I don't know, Kurt. I can be quite persuasive when I want to be. I'm sure we could get married more or less straight away. That is, unless you think you aren't ready.'

Kurt swatted Blaine's arm and tried to laugh in a carefree manner. 'What? Don't be silly, Blaine…'

Blaine looked like he was going to respond but once again his phone vibrated as he received a new message and he immediately focused on that. Kurt took the chance to study him. It occurred to him that it was no coincidence that his dad said those things earlier that day. Obviously Blaine took the initiative to gather some family support, but Kurt had to wonder just how much Blaine had used his father to motivate Kurt to say yes to his proposal. The thought made him anxious and a little angry, both at and for Burt.

'You okay, baby?'

Kurt broke out of his thoughts once more to find that Rachel had left to spend some quality time with Finn, leaving Blaine and Kurt on their own for the first time that evening. Kurt nuzzled into Blaine so that his less-than-convincing smile could go unnoticed. 'I'm more than okay.'

'It's just…you seem a little under-excited for someone who just agreed to get married.' Blaine replied, his arm wrapping possessively around the smaller boy's waist. 'I thought this is what you wanted for us.'

Kurt shook his head. 'It is. And I'm so happy right now. I'm just a little overwhelmed, that's all. I don't think it's sunk in yet. You really caught me by surprise.' He leaned up and kissed Blaine's lips. Blaine seemed to consider his explanation and at last he grinned into the kiss and made to deepen it when-

_Buzz_

Blaine broke away to look at his cell. Kurt shifted back and let him reply to the new message. Who was texting him so much anyway? Blaine assured him he would forget about work whilst they were in Ohio, and they had agreed to go tell Blaine's friends and family the next day in person rather than over the phone. So, who was so important that he would rather spend his engagement night texting them than making out with his new fiancé?

Kurt didn't want to know. 

* * *

><p><strong>Blaine: Done. The ring is on his finger. I think that's a job well done for me. – 8.22pm<strong>

**Tony: Don't slack, man. Gotta keep him sweet until the other ring is safely around his finger so he can't back out. When you hauling the bitch home anyways? Gotta have a celebratory drink. – 8.40pm**

**Blaine: Be back on the 29th so still got a few more days of putting up with the in laws. Might try and get an earlier flight. And don't call him a bitch – he's my fiancé now. – 9.03pm**

**Tony: Dude, I'm just using your own words! – 9.10pm**

**Blaine: I know. I'll have the bitch home by New Year. Get the shots lined up for me. ;) – 9.15pm**

* * *

><p>A.N. Blaine's an ass, right? And even I want to kick the cooties out of Tony, and I created him! Anyway, please review. What do you want to see in the next part?<p> 


	6. When Emotions Run High

A.N. Right. Right. Okay. I am getting this chapter uploaded tonight if it's the last thing I do! Quick apology for the HUGE delay – trust me, I have a really awesome reason but I can't say until after the New Year so if you want excuses I'm afraid you'll have to wait. ^^ Warning – this chapter is totally out of sorts and all over the place but with so much going on it's hard to keep up my usual narrative so just letting you know in advance. Also, wee thank you to my US friend Amy for letting me know things like Boxing Day and First Footing don't really exist in the States – I had to change this chapter a little but at least now it's a tad more realistic. XD

Hope you enjoy it anyway, and please remember to leave a review and tell me what you think.

* * *

><p>When Emotions Run High <p>

'Are you _positive _you can't stay?' Burt had asked for the umpteenth time that hour.

'Dad…' Kurt moaned, packing up his clothes.

'Because if it's a simple case of money I'll pay for the plane tickets-'

'You _know_ money isn't the issue.' Kurt interrupted. Burt's face was heart-breaking but it was not enough. 'Blaine has to be back in New York and I can't let him spend his first New Year in the city alone. Especially not after he juggled so much around so we could be here for Christmas.'

Burt sat on the edge of Kurt's bed and gave an almighty sigh. He had the sad puppy dog look down to a T as he nodded. 'I get it. I do. I just…miss you, kiddo. Having you here for the holidays has been like having my little boy back again, and being able to be here for your engagement has made me appreciate just how much I might miss when you head back.'

Kurt stayed quiet for a few moments before slumping down to sit with his dad. He took his hand and leaned in to rest his head on his shoulders. 'I've missed you too. Too much to put into real words, and I am so happy it all happened back here at home with you guys. The last few days have been incredible, and I wish I didn't have to go.'

That was a downright lie. Except from maybe the first Christmas Kurt had without his mom, this had been the worst Christmas ever. After Blaine proposed, not one conversation passed without at least one major reference to their engagement. Every time Burt and Carol looked at him their eyes welled up in happy tears and they were constantly trying to give advice on what makes a marriage work. Rachel had continued in her 'role' as wedding planner and had bombarded Kurt with venue suggestions, bouquet facts and seating arrangements. Kurt had hoped Finn would at least provide some level of nuptial relief but even the best step brother in the world subjected him to random emotion-filled bear hugs and questions regarding differences between a straight wedding and that of a couple of 'gay dudes'.

The most shocking part of all was that the one man who had caused all this havoc in the first place was the one who gave the opportunity to escape it. The day after Christmas Blaine pulled Kurt aside and informed him that there were some meetings back in New York he really had to attend if he wanted to enjoy New Year's work-free. Kurt tried not to sound too relieved as he agreed to catch an earlier flight. There was just too much pressure in his family home and it was only going to get worse as more extended family members visited to congratulate the happy couple.

'You know I'll be home again in just a couple of months,' Kurt reminded his dad, inwardly hoping the wedding hype would have died down by then. 'And you can always come out to see us any time you want.'

Burt smiled sadly and turned to wrap his big arms around his slender son. 'I know, I know. I guess I just gotta let your fiancé take care of you.' He didn't notice Kurt stiffen just a little. 'I'm just so proud of you…' From upstairs, Carole called saying Finn was ready to take Kurt and Blaine to the airport.

Kurt broke apart from his dad, who wiped a stray tear. 'You know the drill, kiddo, call me the second you land.'

Kurt rolled his eyes. His dad was always so protective. 

* * *

><p>Kurt's heart was aching again. Watching his dad and Carole get smaller and smaller as they drove away from the house was bad enough, but at least they held it together during the goodbyes. Finn, however, had not remained as firm.<p>

'Ah, Kurt, it's been so awesome having you back,' Finn sniffed into Kurt's hair, his embrace tight and heavy on Kurt's smaller form. 'N-now, you call us when you get there. A-and I've put some of mom's baking in your bag just in case you get hungry.'

Kurt shook his head fondly. 'Finn, it's not even a two-hour flight.'

'Yeah, but they might not serve food!'

'That's great of you, thanks Finn.' Blaine interrupted, gently pulling Kurt out of Finn's needy hands. 'But I'm afraid we really need to go check in our bags.'

Finn nodded, replying with something along the lines of airport queues but it was so muffled by his sniffing that Kurt had to assume there was a goodbye in there somewhere. They waved Finn off as the bigger boy left the drop off point. When he was finally out of sight, they entered the airport hand in hand laughing at how such a jock of a guy could have such a big heart. It was only when their bags had safely been checked in that Kurt found a pair of arms circle around his waist. 'Finally,' Blaine murmured in his ear, 'I have you back to myself once again.'

Kurt grinned, leaning into him. 'You had me to yourself every night this week,' he pointed out.

'True, but not really. I couldn't do all the things I wanted to because your family were always just a few seconds away. Plus, we aren't exactly _quiet_, are we?'

Kurt flushed; hoping no one around could hear Blaine's words or see that his wandering hands were getting a little too frisky. 'Well I have sad news for you,' He murmured back, 'You're going to have to wait another four hours until you truly have me to yourself.'

Blaine frowned. 'Tease.' 

* * *

><p>'You're quiet.'<p>

Kurt blinked, turning away from the window. He had been so caught up in watching the cloud formations he had only just registered Blaine speaking to him. 'Hmm?'

Blaine stared at him with concerned eyes. 'I said you're quiet.'

'I'm just tired. You know what airport security does to me.' Kurt replied with an encouraging smile. Blaine continued to stare and finally he shook his head. 'What?'

'It's not just today. You've been quiet since…well, since Christmas.' Blaine gave an exasperated sigh before finally spitting out what he really wanted to ask. 'Kurt, are you having second thoughts about getting married?'

Kurt's eyes widened and he immediately reached out and took Blaine's hand in his. 'What? No, honey, no. Of course not!' Blaine turned his gaze away from him, not believing Kurt's words. Unsure what else to do, Kurt placed a hand on Blaine's cheek and shuffled as close as the aircraft first class seats would allow. 'Look, I just got caught off guard and being around my family was just…stressful!'

Blaine slowly turned back to him. 'They were kinda overwhelming, weren't they?' He offered in a quiet voice.

'Yes!' Kurt nodded, throwing himself back in his seat. 'God, they were just all over us! All the time. Incessantly talking about our wedding when we haven't even had the time to enjoy being engaged.' Blaine was smiling at him now, obviously pleased to know Kurt wasn't getting an early case of cold feet. 'Blaine, I love you. Marrying you would make me the happiest guy in the world. I just don't cope well with family pressures.'

Blaine nodded in understanding and then leaned in to place a sweet lingering kiss on Kurt's lips. 'I get it. I'm sorry, I should have known it would get stressful. In fact…maybe it would be better if we just got married in private?'

Kurt's own smile faltered. 'What do you mean?'

Blaine shrugged, keeping hold of Kurt's hand firmly. 'Why not bypass all that extra stress and get married in a private ceremony back in New York? We could do it as soon as possible, if we liked.'

The suggestion itself, although said in all seriousness, sounded like a joke to Kurt. He laughed but Blaine didn't join in. 'Wait, you're seri-? What about our families?'

'Baby, we can have a public ceremony later on. No one needs to know.' Blaine lowered his tone so Kurt had to lean in further to hear him. 'All that matters to me is I marry you. I love you, Kurt, and if having a private wedding means marrying you sooner with no added stress then I think that is the best thing to do. We can have a fake ceremony back in Ohio to make everyone happy – where's the harm in that?'

Kurt couldn't believe Blaine was being serious. Blaine wanted to get married soon, and with no family or friends? 'Blaine, no…'

'Kurt, just hear me out-'

'I can't do that to my dad!' Kurt took his hand out of Blaine's grasp. 'Even if he never found out, I couldn't run off and get married without him being there. I wouldn't _want_ him to miss it. And what if someone found out and he read it in the papers? That would crush him.'

And there it was again. That look; the one that betrayed the fact Blaine was angry. To be honest, Kurt hadn't seen that look for several days which had to be some type of record, but it still did not make it any less worrying. Surely Blaine couldn't be angry at Kurt's wishes? Kurt was totally justified in saying no, wasn't he?

'Fine.' Blaine said shortly, after many long moments of silence. He scratched behind his ear and then ordered another drink from a passing air hostess before picking up a magazine to read. Kurt was left a little dumbfounded and eventually had nothing else to do but turn back towards the clouds. 

* * *

><p>'So he didn't go for it?' Tony asked. He tipped another shot into his mouth, made a brief twisted face, and then clapped Blaine on the back, almost knocking him off the bar stool he perched on. 'Dude, that's rough. But hey! You got the boy committed, at least that's something to celebrate.'<p>

Blaine's expression remained quietly thunderous. He hadn't realised how mad he was until he explained the situation to Tony. Of course, he hadn't expected Kurt to love the idea but he had hoped that there would have been room for persuasion. But Kurt had downright rejected him – no, his idea – and inside Blaine's blood boiled. Since when had Kurt grown a backbone? 'I used to have so much control over him,' Blaine down another glass of whatever liquor the bartender had given him. 'Now…it's like he's getting further and further out of my grip. I can't _stand _it!'

Tony poured him another glass. 'So what changed?'

Blaine contemplated that question for a while. 'He did. Or I did. I can't really remember.'

'So how did you control him before? I know you knocked him around a bit to keep him in line – doesn't that work anymore?'

Blaine let his head fall onto the bar, wincing as he realised it was a little sticky. 'Ugh…he said he'd leave. And I'm pretty sure he meant it.'

Beside him, Tony laughed. 'Aw, dude, they never mean it! I once dated this girl but she got real boring real fast. So, I started seeing other girls. She got mad and said that she'd 'leave me' unless I stopped but, lo and behold, after she caught me nailing her neighbour in her bed she still wouldn't leave me the fuck alone.' Tony grinned, leaning down to Blaine's level and prodding his head. 'In your case, Kurt ain't gonna leave you just because you make sure you get your way.'

Blaine finally lifted his head, not looking convinced. 'And what if he isn't bluffing? What then?'

Tony smirked and said in a low, suggestive tone 'You just take away the option of leaving, don't you? The boy's a baby at heart, Blaine, he needs lookin' after, right?'

Blaine's eyebrows knitted together as his alcohol-tainted mind thought that statement through. Gradually, he nodded. Tony was right. Who was Kurt to suddenly change the game plan now? Blaine had been resisting so many urges the last couple of months and what did he have to show for it? A prissy stubborn fiancé, with one too-many opinions for Blaine's liking. Fuelled by some form of renewed sense of entitlement, Blaine downed the glass and demanded the rest of the bottle. He had some anger to vent. 

* * *

><p>Kurt's mother had always said it was bad luck to keep the Christmas tree lights on after Christmas day. Not exactly the superstitious type, Kurt had only insisted that each year he and his dad turn off the lights immediately after the special day in remembrance of his mother. However, as Kurt admired the magical tree taking up half of his living room, he figured there was no harm leaving them on for another few days. He and Blaine had to start making their own traditions if they were going to be married.<p>

Speaking of Blaine… Kurt glanced up at the clock. It was almost ten. His fiancé had told him he was meeting up with a few work friends to talk about what he missed when he was in Lima but Kurt expected him back over an hour ago.

_Geez, Kurt, let him have some fun with his friends! _His mind reprimanded him. He sighed and moved to clear away the untouched dinner he had prepared, only to pause halfway to the kitchen when he heard someone come in the front door.

'Blaine, that you?'

'Hmm.' Was the reply.

Kurt smiled, figuring he could heat up dinner in the microwave. 'Talk about timing, I was just about to put our dinner in the trash! Give me a second and I'll reheat it.' He didn't get a response so he went ahead with it. He slid one plate into the microwave and realised that after the small break in Ohio he had forgotten how to use it. It was one of those high-tech machines with far too many buttons and far too few instructions. He pressed one button, then another. Nothing happened. God, why didn't Blaine just get a simple one like Kurt said? Kurt hummed. Blaine knew how things like these worked. 'Hey, honey,' he called, turning around, 'can you come set the- _Oh_!' Blaine stared back at him, standing less than a foot away. At first, Kurt jumped, and then he laughed. 'You scared me, I've told you before not to sneak up on me!'

Blaine didn't crack a smile. The more Kurt studied him, the more his stomach twisted. His eyes were glassy and his stance was unsteady. His hair was more tousled than usual and his expression was solemn. Blaine had been drinking. Kurt was no idiot; after Blaine promised to change he had strictly avoided having any more than one drink. Kurt took that as a promising sign that Blaine recognised he could be uncontrollable when under the influence, which only made his heart beat faster now. 'Why won't you marry me?'

Kurt blinked, unsure how to respond to such a simple, if confusing, question. 'Blaine, what are you talking about? I am going to marry you. See?' To try and lighten the mood, he playfully held up his ring-graced hand.

Blaine's face darkened. 'Don't act cute, you know what I mean.' Before Kurt could insist that he, in fact, had no idea what he meant, Blaine continued. 'I said I wanted to marry you here and now in New York, but you said no. You said you need your dad there. Am I not enough, Kurt, huh?'

Kurt couldn't believe what he was hearing. He had known back on the plane that Blaine had not been happy with his reaction to his idea, but convinced himself that it was a fleeting disagreement. Why would Blaine make a big deal out of this now? Mouth hanging open, Kurt tried to back away. 'B-Blaine, you are more than enough, okay? I just don't want to rush it and do it in secret – a-and I can't deny my dad my wedding day. He gave me so much-'

'I'm willing to _marry _you, Kurt,' Blaine growled. He pressed Kurt up against the counter top placing both hands on either side of him and leaning in threateningly. 'Who else in the world could offer you what I can? Who would want to? You're such a demanding little pathetic freak sometimes but you never seem to appreciate what you have.'

The words stung so bad that tears came to Kurt's eyes. 'Blaine, don't…' He choked out, not wanting to hear Blaine's hurtful words.

'Don't? Don't what? Please, tell me, Kurt, because I can't seem to keep up with all your fucking whining.' Blaine snapped. Kurt let his head fall so he didn't have to look into those angered eyes anymore, but Blaine was having none of it. 'Look at me, you little shit,' He seized a fistful of Kurt's hair and pulled it back forcing Kurt to look up.

Kurt wasn't sure where the courage came from, perhaps from the brief uncomfortable stint back home, but when the pain from Blaine's grip intensified he gave an almighty shove and managed to put a small space between them again. 'You've been drinking.' Kurt sniffed out, 'I don't want to talk about this when you aren't thinking straight.' He started to head towards the kitchen door – part of him even willed himself to run out of the apartment altogether – but Blaine was never the type to be brushed aside.

'What-Don't walk away from me!' Blaine grabbed Kurt's wrist, twisting it backwards to force Kurt around. This time, Kurt let out a cry of pure pain. His eyes grew wide and his knees almost buckled. Blaine watched him, unknowingly tightening his hold to keep him upright. His blood pumped harder as he took a moment to enjoy Kurt whimpering in agony.

'P-please, Blaine, you're hurting me!' Kurt knew from experience such cries rarely went noticed but he couldn't help but pray there was still some part of Blaine that would remember his promise.

'I'm hurting you?' Blaine let out a short, humourless laugh. 'I'm hurting you? What do you think you're doing to me, huh?' With that, he grabbed Kurt's arms and hurled him towards the breakfast bar. He felt such a rush when Kurt's body slammed into the counter and crumpled to the titled floor. Kurt had tried to soften his landing but for some reason he couldn't hold himself up and finally he just slumped down, shaking more than ever.

Kurt's eyes were clenched together in pain. He clutched his wrist to his chest, not sure why his body was throbbing so badly, but that quickly became his second concern. He rolled himself up into a ball. His body became sorely conscious of the fact that it was defenceless. Blaine was angry and pumped with energy. He only hoped it would all pass quickly.

_Please, God, let it be over, let it be over..._

The next sound Kurt heard was the that of the front door slamming. Then there was silence. He opened up his eyes. Blaine was gone. 

* * *

><p>Blaine knew he had gone too far. God, all he had meant to do was scare Kurt – maybe cause a bruise or two for old times' sake – but that damn alcohol got to him and unleashed all the pent up aggression he had stored away over the last couple of months. Obviously, it was mainly Tony's fault. Blaine had told him he couldn't have too much but he let him finish the bottle before sending him home to confront Kurt. Kurt…that angel who just had to look so good, so <em>fuckable<em>, crying in pain on the floor. It took all the resistance Blaine had in him not to take him there and then. Not that Kurt will appreciate that, he was sure.

Sighing, Blaine slowly pushed open the front door to their apartment. He had walked off the effects of the alcohol and was ready for the inevitable process of asking for forgiveness. He had his excuses ready. He only hoped Kurt had reverted back to how he was before; a meeker Kurt was easier to manipulate. Expecting to find his fiancé hiding out in the bathroom, Blaine was surprised to come face to face with him in the living room. Kurt sat on the edge of the couch staring down at the floor with a blank expression on his face.

'Kurt?' Blaine said softly as he approached his lover. Kurt didn't move. He didn't even blink. His eyes were red raw and still wet – Blaine suspected he had perhaps still been crying up until a few minutes ago. Gently, Blaine tilted Kurt's chin up so Blaine could give his best 'sorrowful' gaze. Kurt didn't even seem to notice him. 'Baby…I am so sorry.' Blaine knelt down and took Kurt's hands in his own. 'I don't know what came over me, I didn't mean what I said and I never wanted to hurt-'

'You broke my wrist.'

Blaine looked at him questionably. 'What?' Kurt didn't repeat himself but instead turned his emotionless face away. Blaine just nodded and pulled Kurt's hand – the one he had treated so roughly an hour earlier – to his mouth where he pressed several meaningful kisses along his palm to his lower arm. Kurt drew in a sharp breath but Blaine didn't let him go. He needed to be the good Blaine now, the one Kurt would cry into the arms of after bad Blaine had left. 'Baby, I am so sorry…' He cradled Kurt's clammy cheek with his hand. 'I didn't mean to. I just…let my anger get to me. It was a relapse. A one off.'

Finally, Kurt spoke again. 'A…relapse?' He asked, as having never heard of such a concept.

Blaine nodded, looking as torn and remorseful as his will allowed. 'A stupid, alcohol driven relapse. It's my nerves, okay? I was feeling pressured too and I let something small and stupid push me over the edge. Please, Kurt, I need you to help me. We can get through it together, right?' That had to do it, Blaine was positive. Kurt was a kind hearted, love-believing optimist, and a sucker for helping those in need. It was his nature, and part of him Blaine loved most of all.

'No.'

Blaine's eyes widened. 'Wh-What?'

Kurt finally turned his tired but oddly determined gaze towards him. 'I said no. I can't help you. And we can't get through something when there's nothing to get through.' Then, taking a deep breath, Kurt said the words Blaine never thought he'd actually hear. 'I'm leaving.' Ten long seconds passed with Blaine unable to comprehend what he had just heard. His blood - the same blood which had pounded through his veins so hot only an hour ago – ran cold. He couldn't feel his feet or his fingers, and therefore didn't register when Kurt slipped out of his grasp. 'I gave you so many chances,' Kurt whispered, tears surfacing once more as he sidestepped the boy kneeling before him. 'Each time I thought…but…' He sniffed loudly, causing Blaine to break out of the trance he had been in.

'N-no, wait, Kurt, please, listen to me!' Blaine couldn't remember the last time he had felt so panicked. Part of him tried to stir up the anger from before, because he could control Kurt with anger, but instead all he got were cold shivers. He stumbled after Kurt, blocking his way as he tried to leave the room. 'It'll stop. I swear to you, it'll all stop. I love you – you know I do! And you love me too.'

Kurt nodded but moved past him still. 'I do. But it's not enough. I'm not safe with you.'

'You aren't safe _anywhere_, Kurt!' Blaine said a little too harshly for even his liking. He ignored Kurt's protests and slipped his arms around him, where they fit so securely. He clung on and nestled his face into the crook of Kurt's neck. 'Please, please, Kurt, please stay with me. I'll get help. I'll prove to you all I want to do is protect you.'

'How can you do that when you can't even protect me from yourself!' Kurt cried, and used his good hand to shove Blaine off. 'I'm going to stay somewhere else until I can get a flight back to Lima. You're right, Blaine, you need help but you won't get it until I'm gone.'

'That's not true.' Blaine's voice was cracking. Kurt had fought away from him somehow and now his arms, his heart, felt empty. 'I need you with me, Kurt. Please…I'm begging you…'

Kurt shook his head and couldn't even bring himself to look back at him. He knew one look at Blaine could undo all the effort his heart made to decide to leave. He couldn't crumble now. He grabbed his jacket off the rack, opened the door and was gone.

Blaine fell to his knees and let the tears fall. How did this happen? 

* * *

><p>'Calm down – calm down!' Tony shouted down the phone and shielded his ear from the noise of the club he was in so he could hear what Blaine was saying. 'Who's gone?'<p>

'Kurt!' Blaine wiped away angry tears as he stormed back and forth in his hall. 'This is all your fucking fault! You said he was bluffing, and now he's gone! I-I don't know what to do-'

'Alright, dude, just simmer down.' Tony frowned, finally understanding the situation. Trust that pretty-ass Bambie boy to bring all this on. He sighed, rubbing his temples as he listened to Blaine explain what had gone down. As he spoke, a plan formulated in his mind. 'Okay…dude, I have an idea. It's a little extreme and you won't like it but, trust me, it'll get baby boy back into your arms before the nights out.'

Back in his apartment Blaine fell onto the arm of the couch and listened as Tony told him his plan. His stomach turned, but his heart remained solid. It was more than a little extreme but Blaine knew Tony was right. Kurt would never want to leave him again.

'Okay,' he sniffed. 'I'm in.' 

* * *

><p>A.N. CLIFFHANGER – sort of! I was so desperate to include the next part in this chapter but it's getting so late. Please review and let me know what you think!<p> 


	7. Being Played

A.N. Okay, I'm going to allow myself to rant a little here so give this paragraph a miss if you'd rather. I received a review that bothered me a great deal. Now don't get me wrong, I welcome constructive criticism and I totally understand that many people won't like my writing or my plotlines, yet not only was I offended for myself but I was also offended for the readers who do enjoy this fic. Basically the person hates the story (why read 6 chapters of a fic you hate?) and believes that in order to find enjoyment in it a person needed to have some kind of 'sadistic psychosis'. I repeat: I get why people wouldn't like reading about horrible stuff happening to Kurt BUT just consider mainstream TV dramas, or gritty movies, or crime novels; horrible stuff happens to characters all the time. Any kind of story is supposed to be a journey of sorts, and if you have read any of my completed fics you'll know that by the conclusion the victim character is usually okay and has become stronger after withstanding all the horror which they went through before. It's standard storytelling. Yes, I agree in this fic Kurt has been through hell and the plot is by no means over, but it is not so people can 'get their kicks' or to 'appease the masses', as the reviewer accused. In the last chapter Kurt finally did what all people in his position should do: he left. Was he 'weak and pliant' then? I'm rambling. All I wanted to point out was that by all means, if you don't like the story, don't read it. It's rated M for a reason. If you would like to tell me you didn't like it, that's fine too. But don't make offensive accusations and act superior just because the themes and characterisations don't fit your interests.

Okay, rant over! On a brighter note, I have at last settled in to my new home in Korea and although my work schedule is taking over my life I will hopefully have more time to write in the coming weeks. I want to make some serious headway with this fic and 'A Little Unwell' since I think about them all the time. I'm almost finished with this but still so much for Kurt to go through so we'll see if I can squeeze out another couple of chapters after this.

Please enjoy! 

* * *

><p>Being Played <p>

Every year countless people come to New York with dreams concocted from the flashing lights and glitzy streets paved with promise and urban beauty. Kurt himself lived on such a street – or at least he had up until three hours before he had found himself on yet another trash-ridden, foul smelling dark block from hell. With his hands deep inside his pockets and his nose wet and frozen from the wintry conditions, he wondered why he had grabbed his jacket and not his more suitable hooded coat before he had left the apartment he shared with Blaine. Better yet, why hadn't he taken his cell phone or wallet? He knew the answer; he had been too preoccupied with the decision he had made to leave and everything else beyond that had not occurred to him. Now, with his body shivering, his broken wrist throbbing and with nowhere to go, Kurt was lost in the streets he had never before dared to approach before.

Further up ahead he could hear the sound of traffic and the crashing of dumpsters but the road he walked along was empty apart from abandoned cars and the occasional drunk passed out in a puddle. Kurt was at least grateful there were no other conscious people around because heavens knew they would not be outside at this hour for a respectable reason.

I need to find somewhere familiar, Kurt told himself. He couldn't have been too far from home; he had been walking for hours, sure, but he had semi-consciously walked around in circles most of that time. He was certain that if he were to walk in the right direction for ten minutes he would be somewhere he knew but the question was which was the right way? Feeling desperate and helpless, Kurt slumped against an apartment block and put his head in his hands.

Maybe he shouldn't have ran off the way he had. Perhaps it would have been better if he had stayed and sneaked back to Ohio one day Blaine was at work? But then, how long would that have taken? How many more injuries would Kurt have suffered had he stayed a moment longer? God, it killed him to see Blaine's face like that… It was moment like that which made Kurt's heart feel like things would change if he gave him just one more chance. Would Blaine ever change? How many chances would Kurt have to give?

With that question still in mind, Kurt raised his eyes as he heard rapid footsteps coming his way. A dark figure's shuffling approach made Kurt tense and he tried to merge into the wall behind him so as to not be noticed. After the man passed him, Kurt would keep going in the opposite direction. What he didn't consider, though, is that he had already been seen.

'Hey, you,' The man said gruffly, stopping a mere foot in front of Kurt. He was almost twice Kurt's size and his black leather jacket did nothing to hide the bulky body beneath it

'Yeah?' Kurt tried to look unnerved but once he saw the hard gaze in the other man's eyes his guard rose immediately.

'Money, watch, cell phone – now.'

Kurt's heart swooped up to his throat and his blood ran cold. This wasn't happening, was it? Now? 'I-I don't have anything. I've got absolutely nothing on me.' Kurt stuttered out but he knew that his honest statement wouldn't be enough.

'Bullshit.' The man sneered as he pressed Kurt against the wall. Kurt squirmed away but the man still searched every inch of him until he had to admit that Kurt was telling the truth. 'Seriously? Fuck that! You gotta have something!' The mugger was angry and he grabbed Kurt by the front of his jacket. Three rough shakes sent Kurt's head back into the brick wall behind him and he felt himself shivering uncontrollably in fear.

'L-Look, I'm sorry! I just came out for a walk, I didn't take anyth-' Before he could finish, the mugger hurled him onto the sidewalk. 'Stop - _Help_!' Kurt managed to scream just as the other man's foot began laying into his stomach. In a panic, Kurt tried to protect himself by bringing up his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around himself, made so much more difficult with his broken wrist screaming in agony, but this only encouraged his attacker to kick harder and to aim a few shots at Kurt's unprotected head. 'Please-! Please, leave me alone! _Help_!' The part of his brain still connected to sense knew that there was a good chance no one could hear him. Even those in the apartment blocks next to him wouldn't help him even if his cries could be heard; after all, for all they knew the attacker could be armed. Kurt suddenly became very aware that this could be it. People die on New York streets every day, many from attacks like these. With each blow to the head and every knock in his unguarded side Kurt's hope faded. No one was coming to help him. His father would no doubt get a phone call sometime in the next forty eight hours with some NYPD cop telling him his only child was found beaten to death in some random mugging gone horribly wrong. If only his dad were here-! No, if only Blaine were here. Blaine could protect him. Blaine _would _protect him. As Kurt felt his grasp on reality loosen and the darkness set in, all he could think of was _'if only Blaine were here…'_

Then, Kurt felt the strangest sensation. Gravity shifted and he felt himself be rolled along the sidewalk and his head grazed the brick wall of the apartment building softly. The kicks and punches ceased but he could still feel the ground beneath him so he certainly hadn't passed out. He could hear a vague scuffle behind his back. He flinched at the unmistakable thud of fist meeting flesh and the grunts of at least two men as they struggled with each other. Who had saved him?

'Kurt?' Kurt felt a hand on his forearm and he was pulled onto his back. The world was spinning in a sickening manner and Kurt wanted to vomit but nothing was happening. All he could see was black and perhaps the vague outline of the tall building he was lying next to. Suddenly, Blaine's panicked face came into view. Kurt felt for his hand as if to make sure he wasn't imagining it and sure enough Blaine's firm grip took gentle hold of his. A hysterical sob escaped Kurt's throat with the vague realisation that Blaine was there with him, cradling him and murmuring that everything was going to be alright. The next hour after that was a blur but not once did Blaine ever leave his side. 

* * *

><p>Kurt was later told that he had remained awake throughout the whole night but to him his transition from lying bleeding on the street to being bandaged up lying in a hospital bed with the sun visible through the silky curtains occurred as if it happened instantly. The hours between these moments had gone unnoticed as Kurt's brain effectively shut itself down. The moment he truly broke out of it was when he felt Blaine's hand begin to slip out of his tight grip. 'N-no,' He stuttered out and his eyes met Blaine's instantly.<p>

Blaine leaned over him and pressed a solid, steady kiss onto his forehead. 'Baby,' Blaine's voice came as a whisper. 'I'll be right back, I just need to speak to the officer, okay? It's alright…you're safe here.' Then, Blaine's physical connection was gone and Kurt was left feeling floundered and flustered in the private room Blaine had obviously demanded he have. He finally had a chance to regard himself. Patches of his legs bore wads of cotton taped tightly around him. A large pad was pressed against the front of his body and probably was there to ease the bruising going on underneath. The most alarming of all was the cast around his left arm. As he stared, the pain began to make itself known and it rose from stinging sensations to pure agony within seconds. His arm was broken as well as wrist? He tried to move it but discovered, like with the rest of his body, his muscles did not respond. His only free hand still grabbed the air for the return of Blaine's hold. His breathing quickened and he tossed his head around willing for comfort as tears finally tore from his eyes.

Another hour or two passed in a hazy flash. Medical staff came in and spoke to him numerous times and each time Kurt inwardly questioned if he was giving coherent and correct answers to their interrogations. Blaine was back at his side – although he hadn't noticed when he had returned – and murmured something along the lines of the police were here to talk to him. Kurt nodded and pulled Blaine closer. Blaine seemed only too willing to comply. As the world started to become less and less fuzzy, Kurt was introduced to two officers. The first asked general questions about Kurt's life – easy answers which came out automatically. As his words were written into tiny notebooks, the second officer took to the floor.

'Kurt, why were you on that particular street so late at night? Is this something you do often?'

Kurt shook his head. 'No, sir.' He felt like a child under the intense gazes around him and he looked down to avoid them. 'I-I had a fright with my boyfriend and had left. I was walking. I-I don't know how I ended up there, I wasn't thinking straight.'

The officer hummed and turned his attention to Blaine. 'And you just happened to find him?' His tone was sceptical.

Blaine shrugged as if he hadn't noticed the tone at all. 'I had pretty much gone out looking for him right after he left. Like Kurt said, we had a fight and I knew I had to find him and tell him that he was right. I asked everyone I passed if they had saw him, and it was through pure luck that eventually I asked someone who had noticed him only minutes before. I headed in the direction they gave and then I heard him screaming.'

Kurt stared at him, unblinking. 'Really?'

Blaine met his gaze and brought Kurt's hand up to his mouth to kiss. 'Baby, I am so sorry I made you want to leave like that.' Understandably, he was avoiding talking about the reason behind Kurt's departure, but the fact he was bringing it up at all seemed amazing. 'If it hadn't been for me you never would have ran into that guy.'

The first officer sighed heavily. 'If it hadn't been for you, Kurt might not have been so lucky.'

Kurt nodded to that sentiment. His emotions at that moment felt unsteady and ever-changing but one thing was for certain: he had never been so painfully happy to have Blaine there with him. His presence alone radiated safety despite part of his injuries coming from Blaine himself. 'If Kurt hadn't called my name I might never have known it was him in trouble.' Blaine hummed. He caught Kurt's confused expression. 'Baby, you don't remember calling for me?'

Kurt shook his head. 'I remember calling for help, but…'

Blaine stroked his cheek, smiling softly. 'You were in a panic; I don't expect you to remember everything.'

The officers shifted uncomfortably but Kurt hardly noticed, just like he had apparently not noticed himself screaming for Blaine to safe him. He supposed it made sense, seeing as he was terrified and has thought about his boyfriend in what he believed to be his 'final moments'. He eventually just nodded in understanding. His grip on Blaine's hand tightened when the questioning continued and the first officer asked about the attacker's appearance. Kurt hadn't thought about the man until then, and his body began to shiver as flashes of memory hit him like bolt of lightning. 'Uh…I-I think he was about six foot three, six foot four… He was big – I mean, big built, with huge shoulders.

'Facial features?'

'He had a lot of stubble. Pale, with a wide nose. His hair was dark and long, and I think he was wearing something like a hunters hat.'

'What else was he wearing?'

'He was almost all in black.' Kurt nodded to himself. Unsurprisingly the sharpest part of his memory involved clothing. 'Black leather jacket – a G-1 knock off, I think. His pants were covered in oil but almost like he had smeared it on himself. My dad owns a car repair shop so I know the difference. And he was wearing a clean pair of converse.'

The officer scribbled these details down and for the first time Kurt felt like he might have actually been helpful.

'Uh, sorry, but I have to say I think you might be confused, Kurt.' Blaine stole away Kurt's good feeling. Both he and the officers turned their gazes to him. 'I fought the guy off and I remember him perfectly. He wasn't wearing anything on his head – he had a buzz cut. He did have a leather jacket but it was over a one-piece factory uniform and work boots.' Kurt shook his head as if to argue but could immediately tell the officers agreed that after Kurt's trauma there was a good chance he was confused. Feeling overwhelmed and doubting even himself, Kurt sat back in his bed and let Blaine lead the discussion until the police excused themselves for the day. After all, Blaine no doubt wanted the attacker caught sooner than anyone. Kurt tightened his grip on Blaine's warm hand again and clutched it close. 

* * *

><p>The cup of soup from one of the hospital's numerous vending machines tasted positively revolting. Blaine winced as the boiling hot broth touched his tongue and he pulled the offending cup away before it could do him any more harm. 'Ugh.'<p>

'Not a fan of hospital food, are you?' Tony's voice called from behind him down the corridor.

Blaine turned and grinned at his agent. 'You some of a bitch, come to savour saving my day?' He clapped him on the back and lowered his voice to just above a murmur. 'You were totally right; it all worked like a charm.'

Tony nodded and seemed very pleased with himself. ' I told you it would work – my guy's a professional. How bad did he get him?'

Blaine glanced back towards Kurt's closed door. 'Bad. I did as you said; I held off as long as I could until I could tell it was almost over then I pulled him off. He broke his arm and a few ribs but nothing that can't be repaired.'

Tony nudged him, laughing playfully. 'Enter Dr Anderson. I hope you don't go all nurse-patient on him. Remember Bambie-boy may look all innocent but he brought all this on himself.'

'I know, I know.'

'Buddy, listen,' Tony pulled Blaine close to whisper in his ear. 'The kid is cute so I get why you're so hooked on him, but after you get that ring on his finger I don't want you holding back. He needs to be punished, right?'

Blaine paused before nodding. He didn't look convinced. 'Right. I just…I don't think this whole plan got him to that stage, you know?' Blaine's hand fidgeted in his pocket where a white gold wedding ring perched inside a small box. 'He's clinging to me and all that shit, which is great, but I don't know how far his gratitude will stretch. I hurt him bad before, Ton.'

The two men stood in silence for a few moments and allowed the constant quiet telephone rings and tannoy announcements from the hospital to wash over them. Finally, Tony patted Blaine's back firmly. 'Just give me a minute with him, alright? Let me make sure his head is where we need it to be.'

Blaine agreed and pointed towards Kurt's private room door and then stood back and hoped for the best. 

* * *

><p>Kurt had always hated hospitals. It was a stupid thing to admit since hardly anyone should have any reason to feel differently, but Kurt had spent more time in these buildings than the average guy. Early on in childhood his immune system was poor and he required a lot of treatment annually. Then, when he was a little over six years old, his mother began taking more frequent trips herself until she was at last admitted permanently. No one had told Kurt that she was never going to come home so each time he visited he promised her there would be a freshly picked bouquet of flowers waiting for her when she was let out. Even after her death Kurt found himself in the hospital as his father had to deal with the financial side of the medical expenses. Then, of course, Kurt's dad himself took ill and yet again Kurt found himself practically living on the uncomfortable barely-padded furniture with his father's nurses sneaking him patient meals when they could. Kurt had hoped, with his father's return home, it would be a while before he would have to see the depressingly whitewashed walls of another hospital.<p>

Having been left alone by the doctors to rest, Kurt closed his eyes and sighed deeply. So much for that hope.

'So you're alive, then?'

Kurt opened his eyes wide at the sound of the frustratingly familiar voice. Standing by his door was Tony dressed in a smartly pressed grey Armani suit. He seemed very out of place standing in the hospital ward and certainly did not look too thrilled to be there in the first place. Kurt managed to get himself upright again out of natural politeness but he couldn't muster the energy to look in any way happy to see him. 'Just about.'

Tony frowned and regarded Kurt's appearance, injuries and the machinery he was hooked up to. 'Just about, indeed.' He sighed and looked up along the ward as if checking no one else was around before drawing his dead eyes to Kurt. 'You were lucky. You know that right?' Kurt nodded silently, which Tony could only scowl at. 'I know what went on before you were jumped on, alright? If I had been in Blaine's position I'd have just left you.'

'I know-'

'You owe him your life. So here's a little insight into the real world; anything that guys wants, you give it. Got it?' Tony had lowered his sharp tone so as no one nearby could overhear and he leaned forward whilst taking care not to actually enter the room itself. 'Think of what he saved you from – what he saved your family from going through. Stop being a little whiny bitch and start showing some goddamn gratitude.'

Kurt felt his eyes begin to sting in tears as he was berated. Tony was right, of course; Kurt owed Blaine more than just his life. So much more. 'I know.' He gulped out.

Tony stared at him a little longer until he seemed satisfied with Kurt's reaction. 'Good.' He started to adjust his tie and smooth his crisp suit jacket down. 'So you know how you can start showing your appreciation, right?' Before leaving he tapped the base of his ring finger and gave Kurt a knowing look. Then, as suddenly as he had appeared, Tony was gone with only the click of his dress shoes echoing down the corridor. 

* * *

><p>Kurt felt sick to his stomach when his nurse announced it was breakfast time. Memories of watching his mother force down spoonful's of lumpy grey porridge was almost enough for him to refuse whatever meal offered to him. However, to his utter surprise, breakfast consisted of a selection of fresh fruits – his favourites nonetheless – and a still-warm roll with fillings on the side. Blaine set the tray down in front of him and murmured that he had had a word with the nurse on breakfast duty.<p>

'Only the best for you, baby.'

Kurt couldn't stop the relieved grin spreading across his face and he shuffled as far as he could towards Blaine, who was already smearing a delicious layer of jam along the insides of the roll. 'You didn't have to…'

'I wanted to. Now, come on, eat.' Blaine smiled and brought the roll to Kurt's mouth. Kurt obeyed. The events of the previous night were still raw in his mind, terrifying him whenever he accidently allowed himself to think about it, but oddly enough the fight he had with Blaine a mere few hours before that seemed like a distant and cloudy memory. Perhaps it was the drugs he was hooked up to? Still, Blaine's loving grasp around him told him that none of that mattered now. Kurt had effectively abandoned him yet Blaine still loved and cared for him enough power through hours of blistering cold night, following him into the bad side of town and beating off the guy who probably would have ended Kurt's life without a second thought - all just to bring his one true love home again. That had to be pure love, right? Sure, their relationship wasn't perfect, but they had the right emotional foundation to fix that. What other option did Kurt have? To be on his own again? He was out on his own for barely three hours and he almost died. It was obvious now that Kurt had not considered just how much support and protection he had with the first and only boy he had ever loved. What's more, Blaine had saved his life and, as Tony had privately pointed out, Kurt owed him. And there was one thing Blaine had wanted very badly, only Kurt had been afraid to consider it before now. He caught sight of Blaine's smile at the corner of his eye and decided that he would tell him now.

'Listen, Blaine…' Kurt pushed away his half-eaten roll and shuffled away from the breakfast tray. Blaine's gaze became filled with concern but Kurt comforted him by stroking his fine face gently. 'I still haven't thanked you for what you did. For…finding me.'

Blaine tried to shush him with 'Baby, let's not talk about this now…' but Kurt continued.

'You know we have problems b-but like you said; we can work through it together. I love you-'

'Kurt, I love you too.' As he pressed kisses on Kurt's open palm, Blaine's eyes glittered with the resounding hope that Kurt was his again. Kurt knew his thoughts, and nodded as if to confirm them.

'That's why, if you'll still have me, I want to marry you. Whenever, wherever. I want to prove to you that I'm committed to you just like you showed me last night. When you…you know. I want to start my life with you properly so we never have to be apart.'

Blaine's mouth opened a little as he took in Kurt's words. Kurt held his breath. 'Baby, you're serious?' His voice came out as a whisper. 'You're sure you're ready?'

Gulping inwardly, Kurt nodded. Of course I am, he told himself. The painfully tight knot in his stomach was just butterflies, and the stretched feeling down his throat was just the after-effect of screaming Blaine's name. It made sense to him – it had to – because who else could Kurt trust to be there for him? Blaine's own problems could be sorted through therapy and that was surely something he would agree to in return for Kurt's complete marital devotion. Yes. Yes, this had to be true. Kurt kept the smile on his face as he tried not to think about signing away his fate. Blaine loved him, he knew that now, and that's all that mattered. 

* * *

><p><strong>Tony: Did Baby-Boy crack? Did your agent do good? – 10.59am<strong>

**Blaine: I believe the phrase is 'Hook, line and sinker'? Sign up the band, the boy will be mine on New Year's Day. – 11.14am**

**Tony: Dude, kudos! Leave all the details to me, just get lover boy under the thumb again and I will see you for pre-celebratory drinks at my New Year's Eve party. Bring the bitch if you can keep him under control. ;) – 11.22am**

* * *

><p>A.N. So close to the end now! Bit all-over-the-place in this chapter but again it's because I'm too busy thinking about the next chapter which I hope will be pretty important for our little Kurt. Please review if you have time!<p> 


	8. Keeping Up Traditions

A.N. Hey folks! Not a long chapter, this one, but I think I've given a fair bit of development. I've been wanting to work on this part for weeks but there's always been a reason to hold off until tonight so hopefully you don't feel it's rushed or lacking because even though it was rushed it is an important part for the fics ending. This is not the last chapter but I think you'll be able to tell we aren't far off!

Please read and review, you lovely ol' readers you! 

* * *

><p>Keeping Up Tradition <p>

The tuxedo hanging up in front of him had been staring him down for almost twenty minutes. The satin-like material was soft to the touch as water but warm as thick cotton. This was the one Kurt had decided on out of the ninety seven brought up to the apartment that day. His decision had been a lonely one as his soon-to-be husband was out getting his own suit, insisting neither of them see each other's ceremonial attire until the day. That day would be tomorrow: New Year's Day.

The past two days had been like a tornado in Kurt's life; he had been discharged from hospital earlier than perhaps he should have and was sat down on the living room couch to watch literally hundreds of people traipse in and out of his home presenting numerous confusing choices before him. What kind of origami napkin design did he want for the reception: swan or lily? Was the venue to be decked out in white and purple or ivory and crimson? Did he want the lamb, chicken or vegetation option at dinner? In all honesty, Kurt knew he had been given the unimportant decisions and he was still unsure as to whether he felt good about it or not. Blaine had kept his promise of taking care of everything; within twenty four hours he had every technicality under control, hired a downright gorgeous manor house out in the country with gardens and a dining hall complete with band and guest meals. Speaking of guests, Kurt glanced over at the list of spectators of his 'special day'. He knew less than five people on it. That was to be expected, he supposed. It was ridiculously last minute for anyone, but with Kurt wanting to keep the wedding a secret from the public – and most important, his family – their guest list was mainly comprised of Blaine's co-stars and business associates who had all signed privacy disclosures. Kurt didn't have a friend in the world, it seemed.

Don't be silly, he berated himself, Blaine is your best friend, your life, your world. He is sharing the day with you because he loves you and he wants to be with you forever.

'Til death do us part…' Kurt murmured as his fingers slid off the suit jacket.

'Kurt?' Kurt wasted no time in hiding the tuxedo inside his closet and a second after he closed the door Blaine sauntered into their bedroom. 'There you are, baby.' He came up behind Kurt and circled his arms around his waist, pressing a lingering kiss on his jawline. 'What were you doing?'

Kurt reached back to run his hand through Blaine's hair. 'Hiding my suit. You were the one who wanted to be traditional, right?'

Blaine laughed. 'Right. Sorry, I should have knocked. I just came to get a few things and - Oh! Show you this,' Kurt turned and watched curiously as Blaine pulled out an opened envelope from his pocket and handed it to him. 'A gift from Tony. A fake wedding invitation he made for us.'

Kurt blinked and then forced an excited 'Oh!' He could have said more to feign a grateful spirit but he sensed Blaine knew him too well to be fooled. Instead, he opened up the envelope and slid out the paper inside. As he did so, a shower of glitter, sequences and uncooked rice fell and scattered messily around his feet. It would be such a pain to get out the shaggy carpet... He turned his attention to the invite itself:

_You – yes, you! – are cordially invited to watch the hilarious premier of_

_ 'The Anderson-Hummel Family'!_

_ Love, laughter and a bunch of other L-words guaranteed. _

_Open bar but bring your own rice.  
><em>

The paper was covered in brightly coloured funfair images: ferris wheels, cotton candy, helter skelter and a rollercoster track running down the length of the page and circling around various words. There was even a crude drawing of a naked woman (courtesy of Tony) throwing up above Kurt's name. Kurt frowned. This made him feel even worse. It was corny! The invitation would have been better suited to a college booze-filled party than his wedding, which now was made out to be a comedic spectacle. Growing up, Kurt's dad had always put a lot of importance and respect into the marital arrangement and now Kurt felt like he was turning his back on the precious emphasis of his father. 'Not exactly the most romantic wedding invitation I've seen.'

Blaine threw him a knowing smile. 'Come on, Kurt, he's just trying to be funny. You gotta admit it'll be an amusing keepsake if anything.' Kurt didn't look convinced, and Blaine noticed. He approached him again and slipped the invitation out of his grasp, tilting the younger boy's head up to look at him. 'Baby, forget about it. Let's just focus on tonight, hmm?'

'Hmm.' Kurt grudgingly agreed. 'Speaking of which, are you sure Tony is alright with adapting his annual New Year's Eve party into a last minute engagement thing?'

Blaine dug out an overnight bag from his closet and began tossing in some clothes. 'Are you kidding? He's practically begging to be maid of honour or something. Insists it's all his pleasure.' With a swift _zip! _Blaine was packed. He was insisting on many traditional elements to their special day, one of which was that neither wedding party could see the other until they were ready to read their vows. Being a true gentleman, Blaine was giving Kurt the apartment for the night whilst he stayed with Tony in his spare bedroom. 'Are you sure you'll be okay tonight?

Kurt grinned and swatted him. 'I'm not a kid. I'm pretty sure I can handle one night on my own.'

'I was just meaning…after the other night-'

'Yes.' Kurt cut him off before any more could be said. He knew what Blaine had meant, he just didn't like the reminder.

Blaine smiled in apology and gave his fiancé a soft, lingering kiss. 'Okay.' He murmured gently against his lips, 'Just checking.' 

* * *

><p>The last time Kurt had been standing on that heated rooftop soaring above the city below, hardly anyone gave him a second glance – even less uttered a word to him. Now he could barely move an inch without walking into yet another well-wisher wanting to congratulate him on his upcoming nuptials. Kurt wondered if he would have ever felt good about getting such a reaction but what he knew for sure was that each time someone new got right in his face his heart would thud quick and hard as memories of his attack hit him like bricks.<p>

'Th-thank you, I – thank you…' He stuttered out, trying hard to find the exit in this tunnel of bodies. Drinks were being forced in and out of his hand so fast he couldn't drink anything even if he had wanted to. Where had Blaine gone? Over the mass of heads, Kurt could make out his husband-to-be standing up on one of the raised platforms speaking to his own crowd of people. He was laughing heartily and Kurt felt guilty for wishing he was having a miserable time at this engagement party as he was. As if sensing something was wrong, Blaine turned his head and caught sight of him. Kurt gave a weak smile but didn't pretend that he was okay. In a flash Blaine was off the platform and pushing through to meet him.

'Hey, baby, everything alright?' He asked, using his charismatic grin to charm themselves away from all the intense stares and grabby hands.

No. No, everything was not alright, Kurt wanted to say. His brain hurt like hell, his body was sweaty and clenched up as if awaiting some type of physical blow and his throat and eyes felt the same way they would do if he was moments from crying. But then that would just be selfish to unload it all on Blaine. 'I…I think I just need some time to myself.'

Blaine studied him and then brushed aside some hair so he could press a comfortingly cold palm to Kurt's clammy forehead. 'Come here.' Finding a secluded corner of the rooftop, Blaine pulled Kurt into a supportive hug. They watched as light snowflakes drifted slowly between the building blocks and joined the newly lain white snow on the streets so far down. 'Isn't it beautiful?' Kurt hummed in response, enjoying the quiet for the first time in over two hours. 'It's perfect for us. The layer of snow is like a blank page in a book – and tomorrow we start our own story. Properly. As if starting a new chapter of our lives.'

Kurt smiled with him and dug his hands into the opening of Blaine's jacket so he could bury his face against his chest. He felt so safe right now. Blaine was right; tomorrow they could forget about the past and focus on the future. The mugging and all the horror which happened between them before now would no longer matter. Ouch… Kurt winced as his heart reprimanded his attempt to lie to it. Of course it would all matter. How could it not? Why was he second guessing all this now? The answer probably was due to the other question he was asking himself: Why did he feel like he was about to make the biggest mistake of his life?

Should he say something? Now would be the best opportunity he was ever going to get, but the pliancy he had shown in the last few days had gotten him in too deep. So much money had been spent, so much effort, hard work and long hours people had put in for him for this day to go ahead – how could he back out now? Especially with doubts he couldn't quite understand himself.

'Hey, lover boy!' The opportunity passed as their host interrupted their private time. Blaine smiled as Tony approached them. They slapped each other on the back – forgetting to invite Kurt to join in their boyish gestures – and almost immediately Tony started pulling Blaine away. 'Gotta talk to you real quick.' Blaine paused and a look of concern flashed across his face. 'Nothing to worry about, man, I just need you for five minutes.'

Blaine looked back at Kurt, but both knew it was only out of politeness. 'Go.' Kurt smiled weakly. 'I'll be around when you're done.'

'See? He's cool.' Tony said. His flippant attitude was totally the norm for him when Kurt was involved so no one was all that surprised when his eyes barely flickered in his direction. 'Let's go to the bar.'

Before he could be dragged away for good, Blaine leaned down and gave Kurt's glowing cheek a peck and a stroke with the back of his finger. 'Just think,' He whispered. 'In less than twenty four hours we'll be wed, and we can start that new chapter of ours.'

Suddenly left alone, Kurt sighed and turned back to look at the street below. Blaine was right; it was so beautiful. So white, so unblemished, so pure – it did resemble a glorious blank page of a book. The trouble was, the more Kurt stared the more he thought: Snow always looked at it's most beautiful when it was left untouched. 

* * *

><p>'Are you <em>fucking <em>kidding me, Tony?'

'I know-'

'You said this guy was a professional. You said he was _your _professional!'

Tony raised a finger to his lips as he viciously shushed his favourite client who was glaring at him with fire in his eyes. 'I know – I _know_! He turned up twenty minutes ago. Someone tipped him off that Kurt was here. He says he wants more.'

Blaine grabbed Tony by his collar and dragged him away from the party so they couldn't be seen. He gripped him close and growled 'Then you give him more, don't you?'

'But he's asking for another thousand-'

'Give it to him, you fucking asshole!' Blaine demanded as he unconsciously slammed his agent against a back wall. 'In this situation, money is no object. I have more than enough. Give him the grand and tell him that if he ever comes near me or Kurt again I will kill him myself.' He then gripped his perfectly styled hair until it took on end. He couldn't believe this was happening. The 'mugger' Tony had hired was apparently waiting across the street, threatening to find Kurt and tell him everything if he didn't get more of a reward. Blaine couldn't believe that he himself was stupid enough to get into this mess to begin with. All to get Kurt under his control again. The question now was whether he was willing to undo it all. No. Absolutely not. Kurt was like a pliant slave boy right now, just as Blaine had wished he'd eventually be. The way he looked at Blaine as if he was the air he breathed and the life force in his veins; he wouldn't give that away for all the money in the world.

Tony didn't look convinced but he nodded anyway. 'Fine. You're call.' He began to shuffle away.

'Make sure he knows the cost of coming back into our lives again, Tony.' Blaine called in a low tone. Tony glanced back and knew what he was meaning. This was something Blaine was willing to kill for. 

* * *

><p>I could kill for a glass of water right about now… Kurt thought as he was once again ignored at the rooftop bar. All guests wanted to give him were multi-coloured, glittery concoctions that he could only fake-sip to be nice about it. He lost count of the amount of plants he had no doubt killed by dumping these drinks into their pots. Eventually the barman heard him call for water and had seemingly got frustrated by his constant begging.<p>

'There's vending machines on the fifth floor,' The man – 'James', according to his name tag – snapped. 'You'll get water there.'

Kurt thanked him, mostly for giving up on ignoring him, and slide through the crowd towards the exit. Before leaving the rooftop he scanned the area to see if Blaine had resurfaced from wherever he had disappeared to. No. Sighing, Kurt headed down to the elevator and took a lonely ride to the fifth floor.

The atmosphere change was like night and day; stepping out the elevator to the empty corridor was like entering a state of heaven. It was New Year's Eve and from walking down the cool dark hallway towards the promising glow of vending machines, Kurt could have sworn all the tenants from the apartment block had abandoned their homes leaving the place empty and oddly comforting. He stepped up to the vending machine and pushed in some spare change before jabbing a button. A few moments, and a few clanking sounds later, an icy bottle of water dropped into view.

Kurt wandered further down the corridor as he drank. Every sip brought him closer to calmness. What was he so worried about anyway? Everyone gets cold feet before their wedding. Blaine was probably going through something similar wherever he was. Maybe Tony was giving him a prep talk at this very moment, being the supporting friend Kurt was sorely missing. That's all it was; nerves. He had to stop worrying, he thought as he pulled himself up to a window ledge to take a look at the street below. With the cool bottle pressed against his temple and his legs pulled up and resting against the glass, Kurt scanned the snowy sidewalks and slushy roads. It was so peaceful from this floor…

Wait – was that - ? Kurt raised his head and brought his face closer to the window pane. Yes, it was Tony he was seeing jogging across the road. The preppy silver jacket was hard to miss. Kurt watched with limited curiosity. Tony was approaching a hooded figure standing with his shoulders hunched and his back mostly towards Kurt. The scene that followed was almost amusing. Tony began speaking and did not look very thrilled. He spoke for a good minute without break and it was obvious he had just given the other guy a verbal beating. The figure then spoke back and another couple of minutes passed with them in a sort of argument. Kurt suspected this was a drug deal of something – after all, the guy looked shifty and Tony seemed the type to be involved with irresponsible things like that. I hope Blaine has never taken an interest in – oh, wait a minute. The hidden figure had pulled off his hood – now Kurt could see it was a hunter's hat by it's shape – and a mass of shaggy dark hair came into view.

Something deep inside Kurt stirred and he wasn't sure why his palms were beginning to sweat again. A cold sweat. It was not until the figure turned to glance at the apartment building that Kurt knew what was wrong; it was the mugger.

'Ah…' Kurt's hand flew to his mouth and he almost tumbled from his position on the window ledge. Shakily getting to his feet, Kurt moved so he could watch with half of him hiding behind the wall beside the window. It was a useless action; there was no way anyone from the street could make him out so far up in the dark corridor. Still, he froze in place and held his breath as his mind tried to grasp the situation. It was all becoming clear now.

Tony was behind it all. He had set Kurt up, probably paid this guy to attack him to get him out of Blaine's life. He hated Kurt that much, he knew. Only he didn't count on Blaine finding him and saving his life from this – this hitman!

_Blaine!_ Kurt searched blindly before remembering his love was on the rooftop, completely oblivious to everything going on around him. A glance back to the two men in the street he could sense their conversation was coming to a close by the way Tony was disgustedly stepping back. Kurt had to tell Blaine what was going on before Tony could get to him first! Without a second thought, Kurt ran. 

* * *

><p>Blaine downed what must have been the fourth drink in the last ten minutes. He was still shaking from his conversation with Tony earlier and his hands felt like they were permanently clenched. It seemed the party guests could sense his mood as hardly anyone bothered him as he waited patiently at the far side of the rooftop for his agent's return. Kurt had – well, it didn't really matter which couch he had probably fallen asleep on. It was fortunate that he was out the way, though, as Blaine knew he was angry enough to let his balled fists loose on him if the opportunity presented itself. What he would give for just five minutes alone with him and no repercussions…<p>

He felt his cell vibrate in his pocket. 'Hello?'

'Blaine, it's me. Listen…he says he will leave town altogether if you make it five grand.' Tony sounded nervous. He should be, Blaine thought.

Rubbing his eyes, Blaine knew it would be like this. 'Five grand.' He repeated dryly. 'You know if the police heard about this he would be locked up and we'd be off the hook, right? Still… I know he's bluffing. Give him three. I said I wanted Kurt taken care of but with no lasting damage but he messed up and broke his arm. Now I gotta marry him with a stiff arm. If he pushes you for more tell him I'll be down to repay the favour. Three grand and he leaves town unharmed, or nothing at all and he will wish he had never crossed my path in the first place.'

Tony could be heard breathing a sigh of relief. It comforted him to hear Blaine take control of the situation. 'Got it, boss.'

With a click, the conversation was over. Blaine sighed with the notion that it was one disaster avoided. Smirking a little, he ordered another drink. 

* * *

><p>Kurt couldn't stop himself from shaking. His hands couldn't even keep him upright as he leaned against the wall by the bar. There was a desire to collapse, wail, scream, and wretch all at once. There was no mistaking it now. He had heard everything.<p>

A.N. This was a really cruel way to go about it, but it had to happen. What do you think will happen now? Bear in mind that the next chapter will probably be the last. I'm so gutted. Please leave a review!


	9. Goodbye to Last Chances

A.N. Well, this is it! Final chapter (I think) to a story I've been working on for an embarrassing amount of time which I should have finished ages ago. The story got me so riled up I forgot that it was just a fanfiction at points – you know when you've got to the point you are pouting at the dapper Blaine on the TV show because you suspect him of being secretly evil that maybe you should stop reading and writing dark!Blaine fanfiction. I love Darren Criss. But I also love dark!Blaine, so…

Anyway, thank you guys for all your support and I hope you like this final piece. Let me know your thoughts by giving it a review. Each one is a cyber-hug to me, even if it's just to go crazy over how stupid the characters are being! Haha! 

* * *

><p><span>Goodbye to Last Chances<span>

The booming and thumping of the music and the incessant chatting laughter of the party guests fell on Kurt's deaf ears. Slumped against the back wall next to the bar, he stared blindly at the ground. He had been like this for over thirty minutes. His mouth was dry and his body had seized after shaking so much after he had heard Blaine- After he found out the truth.

The last week played over and over in Kurt's head, each time the memories changing ever so slightly as details became sharper and duller. He thought back over the last few months with vague confusion. How had he got here? Why was it now, at the closing minutes of the year, he was sitting alone on the ground on the rooftop of one of the most impressive apartment buildings in one of the most world-famous cities with his shrinking heart thudding painfully in his tightened chest? When he left Lima this was the last situation he expected to be in. Then again, many things were different to his small-town boy's expectations.

There was a smash nearby; someone dropped their drink, probably due to drunkenness. It broke Kurt out of his stupor a little, or at least enough for him to say aloud 'I need to get up.' in a tone so dead he did not recognise it as his own voice. Gingerly pushing himself up into a standing position, Kurt got used to the sickening dizzy feeling sweeping through him and slowly he stepped out into the party scene again. He ignored the random well-wishers who were still sober enough to recognise him and form words, and approached the most handsome guy ever to have graced New York City.

Blaine's lips turned up into a wide grin at seeing him and his hands reached out to take hold of Kurt's hips, pulling him close enough for his eyes to give away the secret that he too had been drinking. 'There y'are, baby. Where'd you run off to?'

Kurt made himself smile and shook his head as he tucked his chin down. Why am _I _feeling ashamed? He wondered. 'I got talking to someone. Sorry.'

'S'okay. You're here now.' From his seat on the barstool, Blaine leaned forward and began planting hot kisses on his fiancé's exposed neck. Kurt tried not to cry at the affection, but he couldn't hold back a wince when he felt his skin be bitten in what he assumed was supposed to be a teasing manner. Finally he pushed Blaine's shoulder's back to get him to stop. 'What's the matter?'

Where to begin? What would the first accusation be, and at what point was the line drawn and crossed? It didn't matter, because Kurt had no intention of vocalising any of it. 'Nothing. Although I saw you earlier on your cell. You didn't look happy.' Blaine's frown caused Kurt to take his hand. 'Was there something wrong?'

Blaine squeezed his hand and brought it up to his lips to kiss his palm. 'Nothing you need to worry about.' He promised, only Kurt was beyond believing it. 'Just a little snag about tomorrow but I fixed it. You, Mr Hummel, are marrying a very resourceful man.' He laughed and locked his hands around Kurt's waist. 'Does your husband-to-be get a reward?'

Although it killed him inside, Kurt swallowed his hurt and gave Blaine what he wanted by pressing his lips against his. He could feel Blaine's smile grow and as usual the dark haired boy took over and deepened the kiss. His tongue expertly toyed with Kurt's, exploring him and tantalisingly forcing him to enjoy it. Blaine's hand taking a gentle fistful of his lover's hair, he stopped the breathless Kurt from pulling back until he was finished. He caught his bottom lip between his teeth and pulled softly to hear Kurt utter a quiet moan. Only then did he let go and smugly watch him gather himself. Even when Kurt knew he was not in the wrong, Blaine had a way of making him feel dirty and he hated it. Blaine couldn't tell. Kurt needed out. 'I-I'm feeling sort of…wiped out.' He murmured, avoiding Blaine's eyes. 'I think I'll head home. Get some rest.'

'What – before the countdown to the new year?' Blaine's eyebrows furrowed in disapproval.

Kurt nodded. 'You know I don't like big crowds and the loud noises they always create. B-besides, that means next year will be twice as special.'

Blaine may be a skilled liar but Kurt was not. Fortunately Blaine was beyond reading the visible signs and just nodded, ordering another drink in the process. 'I guess it's maybe for the best. Gotta be up bright and early tomorrow – big day, huh?' Kurt tried to match his grin but couldn't. The effort was enough, though.

'Y-yeah… Listen, before I go, there was something I wanted to ask.' Kurt bit his lip. This was it; the last time Blaine was given a chance. 'Is there anything I should know?' God that sounded so obvious. Blaine must know something is up now.

Blaine turned his head back to Kurt and his expression clouded over in all seriousness. 'Come to mention it…yes. There is something you should know.'

Kurt's eyes widened and his heart paused in its beating as if in anticipation. Was Blaine going to be honest? Kurt could never forgive him – never – but if he did it would be easier to do if he was telling him the truth now. He couldn't believe he might actually say-

'I love you so much, baby.' Blaine's face broke out into a smile as he uttered his words barely above a whisper. He ran his hands down Kurt's back and drew him closer. 'And I can't wait to have you all to myself tomorrow night.' His tone dripped with suggestion, his eyes smouldering as if already picturing him naked in front of him. Kurt's heart broke for the second time in the last hour. It hurt like some manic deranged psycho was cutting him haphazardly down the middle with a ragged blade. The pain was only intensified when looking into those loving brown eyes. Kurt wished he couldn't believe the person behind those eyes could ever do anything to hurt him but his damn brain wouldn't lie to him like that. A lump formed in his thought as he strained himself not to cry.

Blaine suddenly looked alarmed and his hands ran up and down Kurt's arms to comfort him over whatever was wrong. 'H-hey, hey – what's the matter, Kurt?'

A tear forming in his eye against his will, Kurt swallowed hard and brought his hand up to his secret ex-fiancé's face to cup his cheek so tenderly that it alone caused Blaine to stare at him in curiousity. 'I…I just don't want to say goodbye.' Kurt admitted softly. It wasn't a lie.

Blaine glowed. 'Well,' He whispered back, 'soon you won't need to. We'll be together forever.'

A pained nod was all he got in return. Blaine hadn't understood what he meant, but then there was no reason for him to know what Kurt had decided. His thumb stroking Blaine's cheekbone, Kurt leaned in and kissed his first love for the last time. It was the last time. He needed this; he needed to say goodbye to the Blaine who had beat him, lied and manipulated situations which included paying someone to almost kill him. He also needed to say goodbye to the Blaine who had taken his hand and heart in his gentle grasp and lovingly led him through the hell of his life into a beautiful relationship which Kurt had never wanted to end. Kurt could only wonder if that part of him still existed. Blaine tried to take control once more but Kurt pulled back before he could. He had got what he had needed and with their foreheads pressed together he closed his eyes. This had to be the hardest thing he had ever needed to do.

'I think…' Blaine murmured, 'Someone needs to sleep.' Teasingly he nipped at Kurt's chin and pulled away. Kurt felt somehow dismissed. Goodnights were exchanged as Kurt took a few steps back. Their hands, their fingers, finally broke off from one another and Kurt made himself turn away. He had to get out of here. He made a beeline for the exit only to almost literally run into a tired looking Tony at the door.

'Shit, Kurt! Watch where you're going.' His facial expression told Kurt that whilst Blaine might no longer be stressing over hit hired 'hit man', Tony certainly was. His stern gaze normally would have taunted Kurt but not this time. This was the last time he was going to see him too.

'Sorry,' Kurt apologised on impulse and didn't bother correcting himself. 'Tony, I just wanted to thank you' Thank you for not being a guy I thought I could trust. Thank you for helping me see Blaine's true colours. Thank you for screwing up your scheduled attack on me. Thank you for removing my blindfold and revealing the truth, no matter how much it hurt hearing and seeing it.

Tony sneered at his words, clearly assuming Kurt meant for the 'kick ass' engagement party he threw for him. Of course nothing was ever for Kurt – they both knew that – but he at least had some morsel of decency to reply 'whatever. You're welcome. You leaving?' Kurt nodded, and a smirk graced Tony's face. 'Good. Now the party can really start.' He laughed and slapped Kurt hard on the back, practically sending him down to the stairwell as he re-joined his party. Kurt watched only for a brief moment before descending the stairs. He was so tired but his night was far from over. He had some packing to do. 

* * *

><p>'<em>Attention all passengers flying on flight NH 072 to Dayton, Ohio, please make your way to your departure gate. We will be boarding shortly.'<em>

Kurt watched as the woman making the announcement went back to sorting forms. What was he expecting – praise for being at the departure gate early? With a nervous twitch he tapped his fingers on the metal rim of the chair he was sitting on. He really had to calm down. After all, he was here. JFK International Airport. His gateway to the safety of Ohio, with his literal passport and ticket gripped tightly in his hand.

When he had purchased the tickets a few hours ago he could not believe his luck. How could someone buy a last minute seat on a flight on New Year's Eve? Blaine's credit card helped immensely, of course, but even with cash on his side he had been lucky. He was half expecting to be turned away and left to find a train – or worse, a ride to hitch – in order to leave town. He also panicked that maybe Blaine would somehow find out about the unusual charge on his capable credit card but it was no doubt the busiest night of the year – even if Blaine's bank had issued the charge as a red flag, there was no way the TV sensation would be sober enough to take their call.

Speaking of which… Kurt studied his watch. It was after five am. Where would his ex-fiancé be right now? Probably lying passed out on best man Tony's floor. The image in Kurt's head made him shift uncomfortably in his seat. At his feet sat a humble overnight bag which would serve as the counterpart for the checked luggage Kurt had given in earlier. It was embarrassing how little Kurt had filled his bags but truthfully as he went through the process of numbly packing his belongings he found that hardly anything looked appealing. His old clothes had been replaced by fashionable new outfits approved and purchased by Blaine and this alone made their otherwise stylish charm seem repulsive. Of course, he had to take a few things. Underwear, a few pairs of pants, shirts, shoes and toiletries but they were not able to cover a faction of his suitcase. So, the rest of the space was filled with books and photographs. So many photographs. Blaine had once commented on how deranged Kurt must be if he thought he could find places to put all of them – that was before he had downright forbidden them to be seen in their bedroom and any open areas of their apartment as they 'cluttered' easily.

However Kurt had not taken home every photo he had found. He had left behind all of the pictures taken of them together in New York. They came with so many memories – a part of Kurt's life he did not want to bring home with him. Every one of them was left tucked inside his dresser, every one, except one. One which no matter how hard Kurt tried he could not abandon. It was a candid photo taken of himself and Blaine at some forgotten party on the third night in their first apartment. New to the city, they had little by way of furniture. In the picture they were cosying up on rustic wood-panelled floor next to a second hand coffee table. A thick blanket was wrapped around them mainly to fight off the chill but to also give them an excuse to be close. They were still fresh and wide-eyed from graduation with no idea what exciting journey the city would set them on. Blaine still had his goofy yet staggeringly handsome grin and Kurt tried hard not to think of the way New York would soon transform that beautiful smile into the smug, conceited smirk Kurt had been forced to see in more recent months. Kurt shook himself mentally. It did not bear thinking about.

Instead, Kurt rested his head back as he considered the note he left on the hallway table. It couldn't be missed. Who would find it first? No doubt Tony; he was supposed to come round in the morning and 'help' Kurt get ready and eventually throw him into the limo driving them to the church. So it was going to be Tony…he would read it even though it was addressed to Blaine. What would he think? He'd swear a lot. Kurt squeezed his eyes shut at the thought of the lowlife Tony cursing in his home – no, it wasn't his home anymore. In many ways it never was. He didn't care about that life anymore. So what would Tony do first? Call Blaine? He would probably be terrified of delivering the news. Maybe he would deliver the letter personally so that he wouldn't have to say those words…

_He's not coming._

Blaine was not really one to care about the crowds so Kurt doubted he'd give the wedding guests a second thought – that would be Tony's duty as best man – and money was never an issue so whatever amount he lost in wedding expenses wouldn't occur to him for one moment. He would be forced to face the truth. Kurt almost felt sorry for Blaine and what he was yet to discover, but then his wounds would ache and he would realise he only should be thinking about himself and getting his battered body back to the safely of his dad's arms in Ohio.

What would he tell his dad? To be honest, Kurt hadn't considered that yet. He'd need to tell the truth at least to a certain extent. But he couldn't have his dad find out everything; his heart was still a serious problem. No, at least for now Kurt would have to lie and fortunately for him he had a few more hours to come up with a believable cover story.

The familiar ding-dong of an announcement tore him from his thoughts. His flight was starting to board. His heart raced anxiously and his eyes quickly scanned the area as if he was suddenly going to be detained at any moment now that freedom was almost within his grasp. But all he could see were tired looking families and coffee-infused business men and women trotting along the line of gates. Kurt took a few steadying breaths as he shouldered his bag. His legs barely worked as they took him the few feet towards the queue forming at his own gate. Before he knew it-

'Thank you, sir, have a pleasant flight.'

Kurt's freshly scanned ticket was thrust back into his hand and he was beckoned towards the gate doors. This was it. It was the end. If only he could believe it would also be a beginning. 

* * *

><p>Miles from the concrete runway of JFK International Airport, an apartment sat empty. In the main bedroom hanging from the top of the doorway was a sleek, classy and crisp tuxedo untouched. The place was otherwise spotless, except from a few scattered wedding presents still unopened and champagne bottles still unpopped. Sitting on top of the hallway table was an innocent looking envelope with the name 'Blaine' written on the front. It would be hours until it was read, but when it was the words inside would be engraved into the mind of the man it was addressed to. Every last word and no more. <p>

* * *

><p><em>Dear Blaine<em>

_First off I should let you know that I will not be marrying you today. Or tomorrow. Or ever. Call me what you like but know that whatever trouble I've caused for you by my actions today are nothing compared to the series of blows you have given me. In case it isn't clear: I know what you did, or more accurately, what you had Tony set up for me. Words can't begin to cover how much you've broken me with your beating hands but rest assured if there were anything left of me it would surely be crushed by your final act of cruelty. I did not think you would stoop so low but you had me fooled so maybe that tells you more about me than it does you. You do not need to worry about the police. I am not an idiot, you covered your tracks and I'd rather not have my name and my family's name dragged through the mud over nothing if I can help it._

_I doubt you need to guess where I'm going so I will not pretend otherwise. All I ask of you is that you leave me as I am leaving you. Do not come to Lima. Do not call me. That is what I want. However you don't have the best track record of taking my wishes into consideration so I will give you this as motivation: I may not get anywhere with a police report (as I have said; you cover your tracks well) but I bet the press would have a field day with the truth of you fell into their laps. How long do you think you think you'll continue to be on top if something slipped out? My guess would be five minutes, but you're the one in 'the business' so I'll trust your expert opinion._

_I've taken the few things that mean anything to me – I found it was a light pack seeing as you threw out most of the important things when we moved into your new apartment. Everything else you bought. I'm no thief and to be honest I'd rather not have anything tying me to you. If you find anything I missed you know where to send it, but I doubt it._

_I need to catch a flight now. Rest assured by the time you get this letter I will be safely back in Ohio so I've saved you the trouble of doing a dramatic chase to the airport. This letter is goodbye, Blaine, and that means it is the end. Cut your losses and, if it is even humanly possible for you, learn from your mistakes. I loved you, and I'm sure at some point you loved me too. If you ever get that side of you back again you might actually make a relationship work with someone. It just won't be with me._

_Yours once,_

_Kurt_

* * *

><p>A.N. Well, I guess that's it? I'll be honest, now that this chapter is over I want to continue it. That's just like me, eh? Always wanting to continue a story. I may eventually do an epilogue but I'll rule out any potential sequel ideas before I write that. I hope you guys enjoyed this fic – reading it from the start makes me realise how uneven it is but I'm so happy with all the support it received! Please let me know what you thought and if you have any ideas, or maybe you're happy with it to end here? Let me know! Anyway, thank you guys so much and if you liked this story check out my other ones. I'll be adding more soon!<p> 


End file.
